Following up on his pledge not to attack Iran until after November 3rd, President Donald J. Trump told reporters on Friday that he will not carry out a nuclear strike against Boston, Massachusetts before December.
Said the President: “As much as I despise that throbbing New England Petri dish of left-wing lunatics, I want to give them a chance to vote for Republicans on Election Day. If they make the wrong choice, however, I won’t hesitate to turn Beacon Hill into a smoldering clump of charred baked beans.
“Boston, it’s up to you.”