As an NFL fan who waits for daily news about any type of progress being made between NFL players and owners, I have thought about actions I could take to help this bargaining process along. Thanks to the upheaval in the Mideast in the past year, I have come up with a plan that might bring the NFL to its knees. I want to stage an NFL Fan coup. It can work. Do you remember Egypt and how social media helped to overthrow the government and then that coup led to the toppling of other governments? I want to start a similar Domino effect with the NFL. To do this I need fans of all teams to come together and unite as one and hit the NFL where it hurts – in their deep pockets.
I know I am taking a chance here, and I know that men everywhere are wincing at the fact that it’s a woman thinking about how to end the strike and not one of their own, but let me put your minds at ease, Gentlemen. First, while I am no Norma Rae, I did grow up in a union leader’s household so I get the whole strength in numbers thing. Second, I have more than a fan’s interest in this. Not only do I have friends who work in the periphery industries of the NFL and whose livelihoods depend upon a settlement, but so does mine to an extent since I run an NFL analysis site, PossessionPoints.com. And third, players in those tight uniforms truly add some excitement to my Sundays even though as the years go by I have come to realize that I can pretty much be the very young mother of some of those players. Now, that I have established my credentials, allow me to lay out my plan to end the strike:
The NFL receives a substantial amount of revenue from TV which gets their money from advertising. Follow the money trail and what this means is — okay, Men, are you sitting down? And don’t scream in panic when I say this — NO BEER: Breathe, now! It’s going to be okay, I promise. I don’t mean you can’t have any beer, just not the beer that is advertised on national TV. So, skip your usual Bud, Miller, Coors and the beer of “the most interesting man in the world –Dos Equis (who I find hard to believe is the most interesting man in the world, but that’s just me) and instead opt for your local breweries or better yet, get one of those beer-making gadgets and make your own brew.
Let me tell you, when the beer companies see their sales spiral downward, there will be a lot of pressure put on the NFL to end this ridiculous stalemate.
I don’t mean to feed into the stereotype about men and football, but I have noticed that men, along with beer during the games, enjoy a variety of munchies – the saltier the better. The snack food companies also advertise on TV during games, so I suggest that a boycott of all the major snack companies be put into place as well. Yep, it’s time to give up the Doritos, Lay’s, Chicken wings, Nachos and Tacos.
I know your stomachs ache for these foods especially from September through February while the NFL is in full swing, but remember, we are shooting for a higher goal here. This is about more than just satisfying your yen for junk. You can look at this “snack-free” time as one of re-awakening, a time to re-evaluate your eating habits and a time to flush all that crap out of your systems.
Honestly, I know going cold turkey on the snacks thing is going to be difficult, so maybe you can find some non-national snacks to buy. Not all snack companies advertise on national TV or maybe, and this is a radical thought, you can eat raw veggies or fresh fruit instead.
I know the idea of eating the healthy stuff is too difficult to swallow, but look at it this way: men without snack food are like women with over-the-top PMS. They will get mean and demanding and scary so maybe a lot of men on snack and beer deprivation will scare the hell out of both sides of the NFL and encourage them to settle.
See how simple it could be to start a revolt. But it has to be done on an organized basis. Someone has to step up and start a Facebook or Twitter group to get this coup going. I would say Linked In but the people on that social network are the corporate type so making waves and revolts usually do not fit their profiles.
So, there we have my plan: let’s get rolling so we can bring back the NFL in all its glory. Remember, Gentlemen, if you refuse to act, not only will you not have football, but you might find your Sundays filled with trips to the mall or worse, watching soccer.