How to Handle Women

[Possibly Rated R, Proceed with Caution]

Women are to be handled with kid gloves… all the time. There is no exception to this rule and you cannot waver. If you do… she’ll bite your head off, shit down your exposed esophagus, reattach your head, and make you take out the garbage. Later that night, she’ll fuck your brains out and tell you that she loves you. Confused? That’s how she likes you.

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5 thoughts on “How to Handle Women”

  1. (Sniffle sniffle, tear drops falling!) You guys have it so tough, my heart breaks for you all. What you have to put up with! And by the way, it’s best to remember that we do control everything – absolutely everything.

  2. “she’ll bite your head off” – Check
    “shit down your exposed esophagus” – Check
    “reattach your head” – Check
    “make you take out the garbage” – Check
    Still waiting on the rest.

    1. Life’s a bitch, then you marry one, then you divorce one, then you die. Any questions?

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