How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Valentine’s Day

It’s such a cliche.

Every year, on television shows and Lifetime movies celebrating Valentine’s Day, the unattached heroine within the story always—ALWAYS—laments that Valentine’s Day is a holiday created by greeting card companies, blahbidyblahblahkillme. It’s come to the point where I can almost recite the dreck coming out of the characters’ mouths before they even finish their sentences. Even my personal antihero, Liz Lemon, celebrates “Anna Howard Shaw Day” instead of V-Day (Anna Howard Shaw being the leader of the women’s suffrage movement).

In a year of “occupying” everything from Wall Street to NBC’s “Community,” I have decided to take back Valentine’s Day. It’s ridiculous. Every year, I dread the holiday like my annual exam in stirrups (not the pants!), and for no reason whatsoever. I was single in elementary school, and I loved the holiday. Why does adulthood have to be any different?

I think there is some sort of air of mythology surrounding Valentine’s Day, almost like it’s “Christmas for couples.” Everything is supposed to be lovey-dovey and perfect, and only if you are in a relationship. Somewhere along the way, someone decided it was supposed to be miserable for everyone else (I suspect it was man).

No, Valentine’s Day is just like any other day, whether you are single or attached. The streets aren’t paved in gold for those who are married or have a planned hookup after work. Valentine’s Day comes with the same toils and triumphs any other day of the year holds.

For one thing, Valentine’s Day is also National Condom Day. How many condoms do you think break on Valentine’s Day? How many unwanted pregnancies are a result of the holiday? Why do you ALWAYS know someone with a November birthday?

And another thing: How many men and women are gravely disappointed by their significant others’ gifts? Years later, at the divorce hearing, you know one of them brings up the “love monkey doll” as the turning point in the relationship. A lame V-Day gift is even worse than a lame holiday gift because a Valentine’s present is supposed to represent how much you love a person—not what kind of cool Cyber Monday sale you snagged.

But no—I’m not occupying Valentine’s Day because I want to hate on it. I’m occupying it because at its heart, Valentine’s Day does have a good message: to let someone know how much you care about him or her. Amidst international wars and Kardashian marriages, we really don’t tell people enough. And it doesn’t have to be limited to couples—that’s the thing these greeting card companies don’t play up enough. Valentine’s Day is an appreciation of people you love. Period.

That’s why I’ve chosen to embrace the holiday. Bring on the cheesy movies, the swooning couples, and pink and red Hallmark cards. It’s so much easier to love the holiday—especially when there will be discount grocery store candy for the next week. Bonus!