The Real Reason We Have iPads


We often think we know the purpose for things which, in reality, serve an entirely different purpose. For example, we think casinos exist to devour social security checks so that people can have gainful employment. In reality, casinos exist to keep musicians and comedians who are no longer “hot” from starving to death. This perplexing reality also applies to the iPad.

We think the iPad exists to let us explore the wonders of the world and follow critically important things like cat videos. But recently I read something that proved how wrong we are. The article concerned a Hollywood entertainment couple who had a nanny. In a successful attempt to make his life imitate a B-rate Hollywood film, the husband had a secret affair with the nanny. He was able to hide the situation right up until a naked picture of the nanny showed up on the family iPad (“Mommy, there’s a naked photo of someone who looks just like the nanny on the iPad!!!”). Apparently, the guy and The Help were exchanging photos on their private Apple devices. But the guy didn’t realize that the auto-synch feature was turned on, sharing his images across all of the household’s devices.

Which is how we now know that the iPad really came into existence to help flush out cheaters. It’s quick and very effective at the job. But the moral of the story isn’t that you shouldn’t have an iPad – they’re fantastic devices. The real moral is that you should never, ever hire a nanny.

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