SPARKS BRIEF: Screams From The White House [Spoiler Alert!]

Los Angeles, CA— John Carpenter, creator of the Halloween film franchise, announced yesterday he will direct a new horror film titled Halloween DC.

A representative from Miramax films told a Sparks Brief reporter the new screenplay delivers tons of screams and horror as it takes on the demented political atmosphere in DC.

“Fact is more frightening than fiction with the current White House Administration,” the representative said. “We’re taking artistic license with the characters, but nothing could be scarier than being behind the walls of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.”

The top-secret plot of the upcoming film was hacked by the DNC (Donald’s Narcissistic Cohorts) and was released today on the Dark Web.

Sparks Brief was able to get a copy of the rough synopsis of the yet to be filmed thriller.


 In Halloween DC, Jamie Lee Curtis reprises her role as Laurie Strode, now working as a news anchor for the Fake News Network (FNN), and she is invited to a special Halloween press conference.

Laurie gets lost in the hallways of the West Wing when the electricity goes out. She soon becomes trapped in a deadly maze of mayhem, murder and morons.

Trying to escape the White House, now known as a “real dump,” Laurie first encounters the mistress of the Hall of Smoke and Mirrors – Saranac Hucklebucklebee. Saranac directs Laurie through a maze of mirrors that twist and reshape reality.

Her journey leads her further from an escape and into the shadowy Chamber of Justice. There a petrified confederate soldier, Little General Jeffy Sextons, tells her only old white men are allowed in the chamber.

He tries to lynch her with a noose. Before he can get a stepstool, Laurie kills the tiny General with a cocktail pick from the press buffet.

Fleeing her nightmare, Laurie stumbles into a closet where Mikey Flyntlock, hidden under coats is stashing national security intel into Russian nesting dolls.

“I’m never leaving here,” he whispers manically. “If you tell anyone I’m hiding, you’ll go right to a Gulag. Now run, Moscow needs an update.”

Laurie stumbles wildly down hallway after hallway when she realizes she’s being stalked by a fat, orange figure wearing a huge tie. It’s none other than Donald J. Trumpkins, the killer of democracy and the terror of the beltway.

He stumbles toward her wielding a pen and a letter opener. She watches in horror as he slashes budgets for the arts, attempts to decapitate healthcare and rips apart the constitution.

Laurie screams for help but is ignored by Eddie Munster’s cousin, Pale Ryan and emasculated Mike Sixpence who is busy building a rainbow flag guillotine.

Stumbling on the carpet, Laurie goes down on her knee. “Don’t take a knee. You’re un-American. Mike leave the room,” Trumpkin bellows.

“Destroy the fake news, deport the liberals, objectify the women, grab them where it hurts!” Covered in his own spittle, Trumpkin lunges for Laurie’s skirt, as she pushes her way through a door.

Laurie is trapped on the Truman Balcony facing the attack of Donald J. Trumpkins. His tiny fingers wiggle toward her like earth worms.

“Help me,” Laurie screams while pulling on Trumpkins unraveling hair. He spins and suddenly a figure darts out onto the balcony and pushes him over the railing.

“Is he dead?” Laurie asks.

Looking down onto the lawn below, Melancholia Trumpkins turns to Laurie and says, “Not dead. He landed on daughter Sri Lanka. He’ll survive, but what about America?” Laurie screams! ………. Fade to Red, White and Black.












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2 thoughts on “SPARKS BRIEF: Screams From The White House [Spoiler Alert!]”

  1. Another great post Vince! I think Hollywood should make this one into a movie. Sorry, I don’t Hallmark will be knocking at your door. A lot of imagery! LOL

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