Able-Bodied But Feeble-Minded

handicap parkingMany people seem to have no problem abusing systems designed to assist disabled persons. Due to such misuse, Disney theme parks recently cancelled a program designed to help kids who, for physical reasons, were unable to stand for long periods of time in ferociously long lines. This is further proof that Disney has cursed America (which I posited here in an earlier post). Apparently, so-called “Disabled Tour Guides” were charging able-bodied guests big money and ushering them through shorter lines while they pretended to have a disability.

You can just picture some mother with her hand in a five-gallon bucket of popcorn shouting “Your leg, Billy, remember to drag your leg!!”

A relative of mine once concocted the perfect response to situations like this. She was backing out of a parking space in a crowded shopping center when a convertible zipped into a handicapped parking spot nearby. A guy in tight, slinky clothes with sunglasses perched on his head hopped out of the sports car and marched into a store.

My relative got out of her car to examine the scene. The guy didn’t have that cardboard Disabled-Parking sign you hang from the rearview mirror. So she went back to her car and wrote a note. She placed it under the driver-side windshield wiper and then drove away.

When the guy got back to his car he found a note that read: “Having a small penis isn’t a disability.”

I don’t think Disney can top that, but they should try.

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6 thoughts on “Able-Bodied But Feeble-Minded”

  1. Sounds like she could just as easily have written that a mid-life crisis isn’t a handicap either!

  2. I will play devil’s advocate here just for the fun of it. Sometimes the placard is given out for disabilities that are not visible i.e heart conditions, lung issues, etc. I only know that because of a friend’s mother. And sometimes those placards are given out as soon as someone turns 65 too. Abuse on both ends I guess.

    1. I think this cat had no heart, like that one character in Wizard of Oz, so maybe he’s legit. But this is good to know, let’s hope he didn’t just leave the placard at home either.

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