Have you ever been to a Febreze Air Effects party? If so, was it any fun?

Imagine if a group of people threw a party, trashed the house, doused the place with perfume, and then brought in blindfolded strangers the next day.

This sounds like the plot of a Stanley Kubrick film, but it’s actually the premise of this Febreze Air Effects commercial.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-zaP16QwjM]

Who’s house was this? Was the family away and the Febreze team just broke in for the sake of product testing? I pity the McGillicutty clan when they return from vacation to find their two-story colonial ravished beyond recognition with nothing left behind but the scent of fresh flowers and a Post-it note on the counter that reads, “You’re out of milk.”

I wonder if a ragtag team of party planners was assembled to put on this Wag the Dog-esque blowout for no one. The best in the biz because—really—how could anyone get so many people to attend a party thrown by an air freshener company? There had to be something special about this affair other than the promise of a sweet-smelling morning-after. Big-titted models? Celebrities? Porn stars? There’s something missing from this equation. Certainly, there was alcohol, but did Febreze card at the door? Was this a bash filled with underagers?

Most importantly, who hooked up at this party? Was Febreze responsible and supplied protection? Or are there Febreze babies running around nine months after the fact? I personally would love to see the Missed Connections ad.

“To the people I had a three-way with at that rockin’ Febreze rager. . .”

Truly, if this Febreze party is the riot touted in the commercial, a lot of people vomited and/or consumed more alcohol than they needed to. Was that all a part of the grand marketing plan? Pushing people to the point of near alcohol poisoning for the sake of a compelling ad? How dare you, Febreze.

But do you know who got the shortest end of the stick? The blindfolded bastards that came in the next day. Not only did they miss the crazy shindig, but what the company didn’t show you in the ad is these sorry schmucks cleaning it all up.