I don’t mind when people wear Confederate flag apparel in public. It’s kind of nice to know at a glance who didn’t pass eighth grade.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 17, 2013
When my wife is silent, it’s b/c she’s wordlessly expressing complex emotions. When I’m silent, it’s b/c I’m thinking about dragons.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 17, 2013
At the end of college, a professor said while we learned from him, he learned from us. Then I handed him a bill because education isn’t free
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 17, 2013
I give people handwritten notes solely so I can put a smiley face above the I’s. That way everyone knows I’m crazy and might kill them.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 17, 2013
Protip: When your wife asks you to spice things up in the bedroom, it’s not an invitation to dump paprika on her lady parts.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 17, 2013
I am a little concerned that you think of dragons over other topics, but we will let that go because I am really concerned about the Paprika thing! HA HA!
I only spend as much time thinking about mythical beasts and condiments as the next guy. It takes up roughly 100% of my day.