So you had a rough day last week, huh? Well, try this person’s day on for size:
A woman filed suit against the producers of the reality show Dating Naked (yes, there really is such a show, it airs right after Stabbing My Own Eyeball With a Fork). During production of the show this female contestant made a big mistake – she trusted the producers when they said “Trust us, we promise to…”
Bad move. These people are not to be trusted, ever. The “promise” concerned fuzzing out the woman’s private parts after filming, before the episode was run on the air. The producers fuzzed out 99% of the footage, but missed a short portion where the contestant was play-wrestling with her “date” on a beach.
I’m sure it was an innocent oversight and not a ploy to draw viewers.
The result? A perfect from-behind view of the woman’s va-jay-jay.
Still feel like your day was “the worst ever”?
Fortunately, the woman had support – both her mother and her grandmother were watching. I’ve always marveled at how women support each other. But other viewers weren’t as helpful. A few rewound their DVR copies of the show, found the key moment, and posted still-images online.
These days, a picture of your naked junk getting loose is worse than contracting ebola. At least they have an experimental cure for that.
The unofficial low-point occurred on Twitter. Some guy with a single name that he’d trademarked (like BuzzDogg™) weighed in and shared the breaking news. Some unknown guy with zero real-world skills who’s hoping to become a celebrity? You don’t want that person having any role in your life whatsoever.
I think I’m gonna get onto this show. I’ll wear a prosthetic schlong that drags in the sand while I sprint down the beach, chasing my “date”. Maybe I’ll trip over it from dramatic effect. And if the producers fail to fuzz out that scene, I’m good with it.
How do they do the fuzzing out anyway? By computerization, or is it done manually by a human? Can one telecommute and do that job, cuz you know…?
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I thought it was called a hoo-hah. That shows how much I know.
After eight years of online research about edating, I’ve seen enough junk to last me a lifetime or two. Perhaps all this junk is ‘brain junk food’ and causing our minds to decay like cavities. Just a concept.
I totally see that. Like shooting Big Macs into your brain.
See if we did what Forrest Brakeman suggested and had a show “Middle Aged Dating” and only Middle Aged people could watch, it wouldn’t matter if they were naked because we couldn’t see it anyway.
Yup, excellent point.
Stabbing My Own Eyeball With a Fork sounds like a painful watch!
When you go on a show named “Naked Dating,” isn’t it assumed that people would see you naked? I don’t think that the other daters, the countless crew people, and the legion of editors can blur out their vision while they are shooting the show.
They should do a show called “Middle Aged Dating” and they can blur everything out except the food at the restaurant.
Pitch that to the Food Channel. Those places are always looking for ways to lower the bar. The other day on The Weather Channel I saw something about “mass grave discovered in Texas”. What does that have to do with weather? Nada.
I just have to think that if you sign up for this show and prance around naked in front of everyone, you really don’t care if your va-jay-jay is showing on TV and if you do, get it bejeweled. That gives it a formal effect.
And how does one do this bejewling?