Will You Become An Adherent Of Placentophagy?

Polenta

It’s been a while since we’ve had a good celebrity-driven, child-related health trend. The last one involved vaccines, in which a celebrity convinced unwitting people that vaccinating a child could cause autism. The science didn’t pan out, but a series of related measles outbreaks sure did. These “celebu-trends” are so potent because they take your reasonable fear for child-safety and combine it with an unreasonable mistrust of scientists. It’s a “fear two-fer” that allows you to believe anything.

And there’s a book. There’s always a book. Here’s the math:

Celebrity book about children + Daytime TV promotional appearance = Scam.

The hottest new trend is for new mothers to eat the placenta following childbirth. According to certain celebrity health experts, this raises energy levels, encourages breast milk production, and prevents post-natal depression. I can already picture a well known figure sitting with the cast of The View and talking about her new book The Afterbirth Diet.

Scientists have determined that eating placenta (which is easily confused with polenta but reportedly has the same taste) offers NO health benefits. In response, proponents have pointed out that almost all mammals ingest the placenta after birth. I imagine that’s because animals are always hungry and always eating. They’ll eat anything because they don’t have easy access to a Cinnabon.

So what’s next for placentophagy? My best guess is that it will take off after placenta appears on the menu on Rachel vs Guy: Celebrity Cook-Off. Cooking something that emerges from your own body is the ultimate challenge for any chef. I’ll bet placenta is especially good over pasta.

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6 thoughts on “Will You Become An Adherent Of Placentophagy?”

  1. In my experience the average celebrity may know a lot about the one thing that made them a celebrity (or not), but they know next to nothing about the rest of the world.

    1. Have done some research, and the only recipe I could find calls for the placenta to be served with fava beans and a nice chianti.

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