Dream Box Office

Am I binging on binge-watching? Should I send out an HBO SOS?

I believe it’s infiltrating my dreams.

No longer do I have regular half hour dreams that end and then another dream starts.

Currently I’m going through a long, 10-hour dream that’s being released in weekly, hour-long episodes.

How frustrating. Just when I get into the story, the dream ends and I have to wait an entire week.

I don’t remember signing up for dream streaming. Who’s sending them? There’s no name on the invoice.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s a great series, um, dream. Lots of body parts are being licked, massaged and cut off. The writing is bar none, and the sets are spectacular.

The characters are a trifle weird. Mixtures of different real people, the strangest being a combo of Charlton Heston, Richard Simmons and Gandhi, with a gun barrel for a tongue. He sells pork chops on a planet called Lulumelon. Could it be my meds?

Last week my favourite character died and now I have to wait to see if she’s really dead. This dream loves killing people, only to later resuscitate them. Probably for ratings.

It would be so much easier if I could get the DVD. It’s not out yet.

People are always saying, “Paul, keep dreaming.” I will. I’m hooked.