2016 Was Weird
This was written, by the way, before Carrie Fisher passed away. It was a strange year. In many ways 2016 was a crappy year, even if you weren’t a Democrat. The weather was so […]
Year: 2016
My Resolutions for 2017
Every one should have goals. Otherwise, how can we improve ourselves? Here are my resolutions for the new year. Never eat lutefisk. Never eat mushrooms. Nap only when I’m asleep. Understand my new cell phone. […]
Among the Old School Nude Rappers
Rap record company Strange Music has a strict code of conduct that forbids employees from stripping naked during the workday unless their clothes “are actually on fire.” The Wall Street Journal I was sitting […]
Kosovan Dessert and Interstellar Space Travel
Kosovan Dessert LLOKUMA INGREDIENTS 1 large egg 1 cup plain yogurt ⅓ cup sparkling water. 1 tablespoon baking powder 3⅓ cups flour (2 more tablespoons later) 1 tablespoon baking powder 2 tablespoons flour ½ teaspoon […]
All charged up for the New Year
When my son was born 13 years ago, my wife and I couldn’t even pay someone large sums of cash we didn’t have to get an invite to a New Year’s Eve party. It was […]
FDA Approves Ruffled Nightgowns for Birth Control
WASHINGTON, D.C. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration yesterday approved the use of ruffled nightgowns as birth control following a two-year clinical trial that found them to be a “safe and very effective” way of preventing pregnancy […]
Evil Treats
Thursday, December 29, 2016 Today I am grateful for evil treats. What in the Hell has happened to my common sense and willpower? Gone, gone, gone with the wind! It blew right into a tin […]
Leaked: Donald Trump Drafts “Greatest Inauguration Speech Ever”
December 29, 2016, New York – After announcing yesterday that he would write his own inauguration speech, Donald Trump spent several hours on a first draft, according to an anonymous source close to the president-elect. […]