Germs or Motes? Waiting for the Frost | HumorOutcasts

Germs or Motes? Waiting for the Frost

August 1, 2017

I’ve been feeling crappy the last several days: either an oncoming summer cold or a bad allergy attack (and/or lack of sleep This is a third shift worker’s go-to explanation for everything). Considering all the dust and the white cottony stuff floating around outside, I’m thinking allergies, so I should stay inside. But I had a bout of sleeplessness and hit the trails at Pokagon State Park, where my wife works at the saddle barn. Did you know that the average horse can raise half a lung full of dust with just one footstep? 3.6 miles later, I can say no one ever accused me of doing the smart thing.

What am I allergic to? According to the allergy doctor, everything that can be found in nature. Although these things don’t really look natural.
Except water. I’m not allergic to water … or maybe they didn’t test me for that?

And now, with apologize to Robert Frost:


Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

And both smelled kind of musty

My nose asked me if I should

Go down something so dusty;


I shall be telling this with a sneeze

My nostrils full of mold

I took the road more allergen

It’s worse than any cold.

Mark R Hunter

Mark R Hunter is the author of three romantic comedies: Radio Red, Storm Chaser, and its sequel, The Notorious Ian Grant, as well as a related story collection, Storm Chaser Shorts. He also wrote a young adult adventure, The No-Campfire Girls, and a humor collection, Slightly Off the Mark. In addition, he collaborated with his wife, Emily, on the history books Images of America: Albion and Noble County, Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights: A Century or So With The Albion Fire Department, and Hoosier Hysterical. Mark’s work also appeared in the anthologies My Funny Valentine and Strange Portals: Ink Slingers’ Fantasy/Horror Anthology. For two decades Mark R Hunter has been an emergency dispatcher for the Noble County Sheriff Department. He’s served over 32 years as a volunteer for the Albion Fire Department, holding such positions as safety officer, training officer, secretary, and public information officer. He also has done public relations writing for the Noble County Relay For Life, among other organizations, and served two terms on the Albion Town Council. When asked if he has any free time, he laughs hysterically. Mark lives in Albion, Indiana, with his wife and editor Emily, a cowardly ball python named Lucius, and a loving, scary dog named Beowulf. He has two daughters and twin grandsons, and so naturally is considering writing a children’s book.

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4 Responses to Germs or Motes? Waiting for the Frost

  1. August 2, 2017 at 5:50 pm

    Just the thought of everything you posted is filling my sinuses with mucous!

    • August 3, 2017 at 11:32 pm


      But yeah, I understand.

  2. August 2, 2017 at 6:07 am

    Oh c’mon Mark, Robert Frost would be proud. Dr. Seuss, too.

    • August 3, 2017 at 11:34 pm

      That’s the nicest thing anyone ever sneezed to me. I mean, said to me.

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