Haven’t Sledge Hammered my Computer! | HumorOutcasts

Haven’t Sledge Hammered my Computer!

September 14, 2018
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Today I am grateful I haven’t taken a sledge hammer to my computer.  I want what I want, when I want it and that statement is most true when it comes to my computer.  It’s acting wonky and pissing me off.

 

Anybody who has ever read anything I’ve written knows that I write a lot and I post a lot and I tell way too much.  Ask Himself.  So now, when I’m back in my hometown, taking pictures like I work for National Geographic, the computer decides to act wonky and the damned cloud won’t download them and that’s a really bad thing since I am now in the town of the best chocolate malts in the universe and a stress (and every other kind) eater!  Charcoal Inn, stand back!  She’s comin’ in the door. . .AGAIN!

 

I’m a little particular about my blog because, well, it’s the only thing I have that’s truly mine.  Sometimes I get my ideas from pictures, sometimes from conversation, sometimes from a damned piece-o-dirt.  I never run out of ideas because I can usually twist that piece-o-dirt into a pertinent piece-o-writing. Then I get a picture of that piece-o-dirt and post it along with my brilliant prose.  I can still write, but the great pictures I’ve taken are refusing to leave my phone.

 

Okay, all you techies, just take a chill pill.  I am aware I need a new computer.  That also means I need $300, so I have neither. And I’ve already done everything my guru techie has told me to do.  Delete old pics and videos.  Delete the recycle bin.  Run whatever that thing is he put visible in my icons to clean up my memory. (Wish I had one in my head.) Update downloads, uploads and washloads.  Restart the computer.  Restart the phone.

 

Restart the car so I can get to beautiful Lake Michigan and throw the computer in the bucolic waves. . . followed by the phone and the 100 pounds I didn’t lose before my fiftieth class reunion. . .which is tomorrow!  A toss like that might be more satisfying that taking a sledge hammer to the computer.  Probably not.  If I ever get this all sorted out I’ll be back.  Lucky you.  Don’t hold your breath!

 

Mary Mooney

From cranking hair in my Midwestern town of Sheboygan, Wisconsin, to eastern Pennsylvania, to three years writing for large hotels in Jakarta, Indonesia, humor has been my constant.

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2 Responses to Haven’t Sledge Hammered my Computer!

  1. September 17, 2018 at 3:23 am

    I’d rather have the chocolate than a sledge hammer.

  2. Jim Nolan
    September 14, 2018 at 7:55 am

    Mary, you show remarkable restraint!

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