Donald Trump’s scorched-earth tap dance toward the Republican Party’s Presidential nomination hit a pothole on Saturday, when the results of a word-association test he took last week at Johns Hopkins University as part of his annual physical exam were leaked to the press. Here are the answers that Mr. Trump provided on the 25-item Skurf-Twinings Cognition Inventory:
STIMULUS WORD TRUMP’S RESPONSE
RELIGION LOSERS
MELANIA REPLACE
AMERICA TRUMP
PUTIN LOVER
TRUST EXPLOIT
UKRAINE BUH-BYE
LEADERSHIP HITLER
ASIAN DUCK SAUCE
HISPANIC FAJITA
BLACK LIBERIA
JUSTICE FANTASY
SEX MARTHA STEWART
DEMOCRACY SUCKERS
GAZA OPPENHEIMER
INFLATION PENIS
HITLER HERO
LAW OBSOLETE
MORALITY WHY?
LIE WHY NOT?
GUNS MORE
RACE WAR
INSURRECTION ERECTION
HUMOR HUMILIATION
WOMAN RACK
IMMIGRATION MORE OPPENHEIMER
Reviewing Trump’s answers, a professor in the Department of Psychological & Brain Sciences at Hopkins who wished to remain anonymous remarked, “the former President’s profile displays a number of tendencies that should concern every voter. As for me, I’m scared s**tless.”