Dancing to Etta James | HumorOutcasts

Dancing to Etta James

June 19, 2012
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I was on the elliptical at the gym, just casually exercising when Etta James’ Rock Me Baby began to play on my iPod.  If you do not know this song, you can watch Etta James perform it here:    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxnR0TLp0o0.

While I love all of Etta’s work, this song is probably near the top of my favorites, so I tend to dance to it whenever I hear it, and sometimes I am not even aware that I am dancing.  I think I experienced one of those “not aware” moments because I noticed a younger guy who was lifting weights sizing me up. 

What I am going to say next might insult some of the males of our species, but here it goes: Do you know how men are not that complicated and you can pretty much pick up what they are thinking and usually what they are thinking involves sex in some way?  Well, this man was wearing a look that said sex was on his mind, and if I could write a caption to that look it would be, “Wow, she must be one over-the-hill stripper.”

My first thought was “Over-the-hill stripper? Really? Who are you? Probably, some poor woman’s boy toy.”  My second and more logical thought was “Oh crap! How much was I dancing?”  I quickly switched songs and the Monkees, Daydream Believer, which is definitely not a stripper song, started to play. Had I been near the end of my workout, I would have exited the gym because I was a bit embarrassed. However,  I was only ten minutes into my exercise routine, and ten minutes will not erase the two packs of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups that jumped into my cart at Target yesterday.  

If I did not know better, I would swear that the young man could hear the music on my iPod because he stopped looking at me as soon as the Bluesy, sexy Etta  ended, and the Monkees started. He moved on to a younger chick who glistened when she sweated. I am not kidding. She looked as if she wore tiny diamonds instead of gross perspiration.  Was I insulted? No, not really, but I did learn a lesson which I feel compelled to pass on: If you have to become an over-the-hill stripper, make sure you dance to Etta James and sweat pretty. If you do these two things, men will never look away.

Donna Cavanagh

Donna Cavanagh, the Founder of HumorOutcasts.com and the newly launched HumorOutcasts Press/Shorehouse Books, is a veteran journalist whose detour into humor writing has landed her on the pages and blogs of national newspapers and magazines including MORE and FIRST. A former humor columnist for Journal Register Papers, she was a USA Books Contest finalist for her first book "Life On The Off Ramp". A new book which she helped pen with her dogs "A Canine's Guide to the Good Life" has joined two other published humor books "Reality: Fantasy's Evil Twin" and "Try and Avoid the Speed Bumps". Host of BlogTalk's HumorOutcasts Radio, Donna's goal is to help writers find their audience. She hopes to make HumorOutcasts.com THE place to go to for a daily laugh and HumorOutcasts Press, THE place where writers can achieve their publishing dream.

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6 Responses to Dancing to Etta James

  1. June 20, 2012 at 7:06 pm

    I LOVE Etta James. Maybe he was turned on by you AND the music! : )

    • June 21, 2012 at 8:27 am

      Ah, how sweet is youth Megan. Nah, he pretty much had a look of fear.

  2. June 20, 2012 at 7:09 am

    That voice makes all the pain in the world disappear.

    • June 20, 2012 at 3:55 pm

      That is so true! I just love her.

  3. Deb Martin-Webster
    June 19, 2012 at 8:21 pm

    Don’t feel bad Donna I overheard a young guy whisper to his friend as I sprinted pass them on the grand staircase at Biltmore, “Man, that old lady must have buns of steel!” I didn’t know whether to be flattered or punch ‘em!

    • June 19, 2012 at 8:27 pm

      He couldn’t just say “that lady”? He had to stick the adjective “old” in there? Idiot kid.



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