Harold Camping, Armageddon and Rapture Preacher extraordinaire has decided to retire. The man, who personifies the old adage, “Fool me once shame on you; fool me twice shame on me; and fool me three times, just shoot me in the foot” (okay, I made up the part about shooting him in the foot), has decided that he no longer can preach the word and predict when the Rapture will occur. Camping asserted that God had given gave him the means to decode the bible thus enabling him to determine the exact date for the end, but apparently, the only thing God gave him was one big symbolic wedgie as now poor Harold is the butt of so many Armageddon jokes.
In Harold’s defense, I must say the world is going to be a dull place without his dire prognostications. There will be no more end of the world parties; no more theories and guesses about who gets Raptured and who doesn’t; and no more wondering if clothes are included as part of the prize package for being beamed up or do Rapturees have to pack.
So long, Harold and I wish you a nice and long retirement. Just a thought though: If you get bored and need some end-of-the-world action, the Mayan calendar is scheduled to end in just about a year. I am sure some doomsday group will have at least some part-time work for you. A good Armageddon prognosticator is always in need.