I Seriously Do not Understand Why the Revolution Has not Started

remember these guys? They died so you can vote, just like Jesus.

Ever wonder what’s it like to live a life so driven by greed, power and self-interest that you’d openly cheat in the hopes that people will be so complaisant as to not even try to fight it? Enter the Orwellian weasel-fuckers that call themselves the GOP. Republicans enacting desperate restrictive election laws proves one thing: the party has reached a spoken, internal consensus that it must cheat in order to win.

The very idea that even Republicans would stoop to such embarrassing machinations, that make a mockery of our democracy, that devalue the freedom of speech, the freedom of religion and the right to assemble, is so perverse it is hard to wrap my head around. What could be more  un-American than the desire to exclude as many people and silence as many voices as possible?

The history of a place is often dictated by the fortune or misfortune of its location. Such it is that Philadelphia, the birthplace of the U.S. Constitution and American democracy has the most heinous voter ID laws in the country.  ShitforBrains corporate stooge, Governor Tom Corbett signed these voter ID requirements into law, requirements that are pathologically insane.

To obtain a Pennsylvania Photo Identification card, an individual needs to visit a Pennsylvania Department of Transportation Driver License Center with a completed Application for an Initial Photo Identification Card; form DL-54A, and the following:

Social Security Card AND one of the following:

  • Certificate of U.S. CitizenshipCertificate of Naturalization
  • Valid U.S. Passport
  • *Birth Certificate with a RAISED SEAL


  • Two proofs of **residency such as lease agreements, current utility bills, mortgage documents, W-2 form, tax records.They are willing to waive the $13.50 fee for acquiring an Identification Card for individuals completing the Oath/ Affirmation Voter ID form. BUT all identification documentation is still required to obtain an Identification Card!
  • *If they do not have a birth certificate with a “raised seal” and are a PA native; and do not have one of the acceptable forms of photo identification to vote, they must visit the PennDOT driver license center, and:
  • Sign an oath/affirmation that they do not have an acceptable form of ID for voting purposes and the photo ID is needed for voting purposes;
  • Show a Social Security card and two proofs of residence, such as a deed, lease, tax bill, or utility bill;
  • Fill out a DL-54A form requesting a non-driver photo ID and;
  • Complete the HD01564F (Request for Certification of Birth Record for Voter ID Purposes Only) form
  • Voters going to the polls without a photo ID, including indigent voters unable to pay necessary fees to get an ID, will be allowed to cast “provisional” ballots –  and will “have six days to provide all those forms of ID they couldn’t drum up before the election your photo ID to have your ballot count”. SIX DAYS. Why don’t all polling places just include a Wipeout-style obstacle course just to get in the goddamn door? Governor shitface says:

    “I am signing this bill because it protects a sacred principle, one shared by every citizen of this nation. That principle is: one person, one vote. It sets a simple and clear standard to protect the integrity of our elections.”

    Sure, PennDOT will get those 8,000,000 people IDs by November, I mean, look at how nice and paved all our roads are in PA. A proposal, Governor ShitforBrains: in return for A universal ID, why not require universal voting, Australia-style? If one person, one vote is a “sacred” principle, the GOP should have no problem with all persons (and no, Mitt, not corporations) actually voting. If we truly want “more democracy”, that’s the way to go, right? We might vote in some civics classes after that.

    George Weigel says:

    “If you can’t buy beer at the ballpark without valid ID, or withdraw money from your savings account without valid ID, or get on a plane without valid ID, or pick up a medical prescription without a valid ID, you shouldn’t be admitted to a voting booth without valid ID. Enough Chicago-graveyard-voting jokes are enough.”

    I want to kick a baby every time I hear this argument. False analogies have no place in argumentation. Voting is completely unlike buying beer, using the ATM, boarding a plane, or picking up my Cymbalta at the Walgreens, and Mr. Weigel knows it, so stop the fear mongering and false analogies. None of those things are constitutionally guaranteed and none of them are a critical basis of our republic. If I couldn’t get my anti depressants tomorrow, I would go bananas but the nation wouldn’t crumble.

    The Voting Rights Act of 1965 as amended is specific in its intent. No amount of disenfranchisement is allowed. NONE. No laws can be enacted that in any way result in the loss of or an impediment to the right to vote. States can enact voter ID laws – thanks to the Supreme Court in 2008  – because of “voter fraud”, which Pennsylvania didn’t even try to prove, because, you know, literally all voter fraud is perpetrated by Republican officials and they know it.

    The emerging voter narrative among middle class voters is one of never approving tax increases if the government can’t prove that they are spending the money these voters approve us. And those things don’t include financing anything that might benefit in anyway any member of the illegal population, or any program that smacks of “handouts”. Jesus, Republicans must look at the changing demographics in this country and go ape-shit. They are proactively counterbalancing what will eventually become a democratic leaning majority, a time-honored strategy.

    In the Fuckeye State, heavily Democratic cities like Cleveland and Columbus suddenly have new early voting hours limitations, because even if you can’t hide behind the military to temporarily disenfranchise Democrats, there are other ways. Reeling from the 2008 election results, Ohio Republicans drastically curtailed the early voting period from thirty-five to eleven days, with no voting on the Sunday before the election. How bad could access to polls be? How about – sorry working stiffs! –  8 am until til 5 pm on weekdays, with NO VOTING at night or during the weekend? Democrats fought this, but, alas, Ohio GOP Secretary of State Jon Husted stuck his fat nose in on behalf of his fellow Republicans. In explaining his decision to deny expanded early voting hours in heavily Democratic counties, he said:

    ‘I cannot create unequal access from one county board to another, and I must also keep in mind resources available to each county”.

    I mean, that makes sense, right? You wouldn’t want unequal access across the state. Wait, what? In solidly Republican counties like Warren and Butler, GOP election commissioners have approved expanded early voting hours on nights and weekends? So, you’re saying that the counties where Ohio Republicans are denying expanded early voting are those that strongly backed Barack Obama in 2008, while most of the counties where the extra hours will stand heavily supported  John McCain? And yet LeBron James is loathed for wanting to get the fuck out of Ohio? Perhaps in response, Democrats should open polling places in 24 hour 7-11′s and Wawa’s. “These Krimpets, and a vote for Obama for me, please”. Or, let’s tell Republicans that November 6 is Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day II and they can cast their vote with their order.

    Guys, can this even be a real thing? This is like some old coot crackpottery you read about in the comments section of  ”Parade” magazine. This is America. Americans are, at the very least, supposed to have our thorough corruption of the voting process appear neutral, but conservative legislators aren’t even pretending any more. Why do conservative judges still find the need to cover for them? Why can’t they just be honest and say in their opinions, “While this law will disenfranchise thousands of legitimate voters, those concerns are secondary to the overriding need to prevent Democrats from winning office.” This assault on bonafide Americans is an affront to everything I’ve come to expect from targeted voting restrictions in America! This is why I don’t believe in conspiracy theories: The people who demand power and strive to disenfranchise various people and parts of society are doing it out in the open. The GOP are like a bunch of Iranian Mullahs running a fair election.

    All this voter ID shit and curtailed hours and purging of the rolls shenanigans, passed without an intervening general election… Legislators should face an intervening election, otherwise it looks like they are rigging the system to help insure their own re-election, cheating. With no actual fraud.First time in U.S. history voting’s been restricted. One can only hope that this wakes up those fence-sitting independent voters to the conservative’s continuing unconstitutional, illegal and immoral agenda.



    If you can prove you did, I”ll give you a prize.

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13 thoughts on “I Seriously Do not Understand Why the Revolution Has not Started”

  1. Welcome to the third world, suckers.

    The republicans have basically said they don’t want to play the democracy game any more. After bringing democracy to Iraq, afghanistan, iran, haiti, the philippines, cuba, mexico, granada, they have decided to bring it home.

    They don’t like it when people vote their choices in. They want us all to have their choices. If they win it, let them try to run it.

  2. Personally, I think you should have to pass a test to vote. We have so many people who have no idea what their candidate really stands for. I am constantly amazed by how little people know. If people took the time to understand what the truth is, no democrat would win again. It amuses me to see posts like this one. Not only has Obama run up more debt than all Presidents combined before 2000, he also holds the record for telling the most lies. If the recent gaff by Biden doesn’t prove how slimy the democrats are, nothing will. If a Republican had said what he did, his career would be over. They still have the media in their pocket.

    1. Wrong, Obama has had the lowest spending rate SINCE Eisenhower. Also almost half of the jobs that were lost in the “recession” have been regained. Unemployment went from 10.2 – 10.3% to 8.3%. How could you call that a failure when that is literally actual proof that the economy is doing slightly better? The point is, voting is one of our constitutional rights, they have no right to prove that a voter needs a lease agreement, proof of bills, etc. You should need a license or social or birth certificate, or passport. Done.

    2. Your party did have a “test to vote” until 1965, when an enlightened society deemed it egregious. That “test” involved enacting elaborate voter registration procedures whose primary purpose was denying African-Americans, Latinos and Native Americans the right to vote (exactly what is going on now, and what this post is actually about – not Biden’s “gaffe”). If anyone were to construct a “test”, it damn well better test for a a remedial comprehension of context, reasoning and analytical thought, all of which is sorely lacking in a huge segment of the population, as well as in your comment.

  3. Kansas, where I live, has yet to implement these kind of laws. Probably because, the majority of the state already votes Republican and makes me really LOVE the electoral college! My votes for president never count.

  4. Wow! All I have to do to vote in New York City is go to my polling place, go to the right table, wait until they find my name on the list and tick it off, then go into the booth and vote. Once you are registered to vote in your district here, it’s no problem.

    1. That’s because you have a democratic governor. Same here in Los Angeles, I just have to give my name and address, no ID required. Can you imagine someone going to your polling place and using your name to fraudulently vote? If that happened, EVER, we wouldn’t have the system you and I have, which is basically an honor system that works.

  5. So, Pennsylvania that has a really large elderly population who might not drive anymore is going to tell these people that they cannot vote. I say this because how many of those who surrendered their licenses or let them expire are going to go through the time-consuming and tedious task of getting all these documents together. And that is just one part of the state’s population that will not be able to vote. This is just ridiculous!

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