Remember being a kid and trying to get out of school? You had zero options. You’d lie in bed coughing theatrically while telling Mom you were sick. But she’d just feel your forehead and then tell you to get cracking. That’s how you ended up like me — passed out on the floor in Science after pricking a finger and trying to observe a drop of blood under a microscope.
And pulling a fire alarm wasn’t worth the hassle. That only bought you an hour milling around the parking lot.
But things have totally changed. Today the adults are actually helping kids dodge class. To wit:
A sixth grade teacher in Utah recently shot herself in the leg while using a school restroom. Unlike the toilet, which exploded, the woman survived. Around the same time a teacher in Idaho shot himself in the foot while scribbling on a chalk board.
Class dismissed!
You can just picture those two kids who weren’t ready for the quiz high-fiving in the back row. But it’s not just responsible gun owners willing to sacrifice a leg bone who are helping the kids out. Over at the Renaissance Charter High School For Innovation in New York City a teacher took innovation to a whole new level. The guy was stuck in a staff meeting. So he jokingly sent his wife a text message asking her to call in a bomb threat. And she did.
Kids today have it so much easier. Totally not fair.
College Education majors would probably know this as How to Set a Bad Example the Hard Way 101.
Just goes to show: there are D students in every profession.
This same concept would probably get me out of work, too. Thanks for the idea!
So the wife didn’t know the bomb text was made in jest? And new rule, if you can’t guarantee that you won’t shoot your body parts off by walking and talking, you can’t bring a gun to school. Wait, is that right? Sounds a little odd.
Kevlar pants and shoes are the answer.