The Stark Shark Reality By Barry

“Hi, my name is Barry. I love long romantic swims by the shoreline, frolicking in the frothy surf while nibbling on your beautifully manicured toes.”


Barry GWS here! In honor of my very special week, I thought I’d share a few quotes I saw posted on Twitter about us sensitive and  misunderstood fish:

“They only attack if they sense fear.” said the man who shit his pants when a piece of seaweed brushed against his leg.

“Don’t worry, these cages will protect us from shark attacks.” said the man missing a leg and two fingers from both hands.

“Great whites don’t eat people!” said the woman swimming with her husband and pet seal.  “Hold on . . . where is my husband?”

“Shark Week filmmakers make this stuff up.  Huge man-eating sharks, pffffff, there’s no such thing.  They’re a bunch of wanna-be-scientific-aqua-wusses!” said the jerk that hasn’t been in the water since Jaws 1975.

“Sharks are just misunderstood creatures.  They loved to be stroked and cuddled,” said no one.

Hah, I made the last one up myself.  Hey, sharks have a sense of humor too. So enjoy your time at the beach and remember if you see me while you’re swimming I promise I won’t eat you if you introduce me to that delicious, eh, I mean hot blonde by the sand bar.


Thanks Candice M.

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4 thoughts on “The Stark Shark Reality By Barry”

  1. It’s all a great big lie Deb. Sharks are not real. How do I know, you ask? Well, I seen the making of Jaws!

    1. What? Sharks aren’t real you say Bill Y? Whew, that’s a relief. Now I only need to worry about vampire mermaids!

  2. Thanks, Barry, but I can think of better ways to leave this earth than to become a fish’s dinner.

    1. Barry totally understands. He was thinking of going vegan – Shrimp flavored Tofu, yum!

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