We Won’t Leave The Light On


Last week, a crowd of 300 protesters confronted three buses carrying undocumented migrant children and their parents near Murrieta, California. Waving flags and punching placards in the air, the protesters blocked the road. The buses were forced to turn around.

A reporter for the Murietta Star Tribune interviewed a few of the protesters after the event. Here’s what they had to say:

Emily, age 40: “It’s hard-working Americans like me that make America great. That’s why I skipped work to be here today.”

Bob, age 65: “My great-great grandparents came over from Hungary on a boat. Nobody bothered them. They were welcomed to America. But this is totally different.”

Jim, age 50: “Immigrants? What immigrants? I thought this was a protest against mass transit.”

Ray, age 34: “Yeah, I get it. Some guy staggers through the desert under a blazing sun and almost dies of thirst. He gets caught and they send him back home, but he still tries again. I know, I know – if that guy can take my job after all that, maybe I need to up my game. But I still don’t like it.”

Joe, age 65: “Wait. This isn’t the line for buses going to the casino?”

Jen, age 40: “I haven’t had a raise in five years. I’m pissed off and looking for someone to blame. But I can’t vent on my boss because he has more power than me. So this rally is perfect.”

Jamie, age 50: “My ancestors had to travel to America in a cramped, stinky boat full of people getting sick. But look at this – is that bus air-conditioned? I’ll bet they even have wi-fi on that thing!”

The rallies are expected to continue until one of the main organizers slips up and makes an offensive racial slur.

Share this Post:

7 thoughts on “We Won’t Leave The Light On”

  1. I think your conclusion will turn out to be incredibly prophetic. Everyone loved that knuckle-headed cattle rancher until he turned out to be a racist pig. The sports world delighted in Donald Sterling’s “quirky” character, until he turned out to be a racist pig.

    You made me laugh. Murrieta makes me sad.

  2. Did the protesters just get lucky or did the busses have “this bus is carrying undocumented migrant children and their parents” signs on them?

    1. Somebody tipped off the mayor He tipped off the protesters. I think these protesters are racist pigs. I do not need to wait for them to actually speak the disgusting words to know this.

  3. I have no words. Humorously perfect and to the point. There, that’s six words that I hope do this post justice. Well done. I will be sharing this everywhere.

Comments are closed.