I made two resolutions for the new year – (1) defeat my gut and (2) stop reading crap news. Regarding the second, I’ve got a college degree, for god’s sake. So why am I drawn to The Junk? This surely needs to end.
Well, I’m sticking with the first resolution but breaking the 2nd (that didn’t take long). Why? Because I just realized something: buried within the towering mound of cultural garbage are nuggets of wisdom that you can’t find at highbrow outlets like PBS or The New York Times. And I get to pass these along to people like you, who are currently breaking your resolution to stop reading things like this. So it’s a win-win and allows us tell ourselves that we’re not squandering our lives.
Fact: breaking a dumb resolution entirely justified. So let’s continue sans-guilt, shall we?
The Crap News recently reported on a reality star caught speeding on an Atlanta freeway. She was flying, which apparently is how a Real Housewife drives. And she was driving on a suspended license.
The woman’s name is Porsha.
Her parents probably wonder why their daughter has issues involving cars. The takeaway is simple — names really do matter. They play a big part in the course of a kid’s future. Who knows why this is, but it is.
I’m so glad my parents didn’t name me Glock.
I’m glad, Thomas, that you decided not to take all the fun out of life. 😉
I love junk food news….I can’t help myself. And if I had to give up actual junk food, myself deserves the ‘treats’ of the written word. Please continue to enable my addiction.
If people didn’t read crap, Bill Y would be in trouble!