WALTHAM, Mass. This city on the Charles River has been known as a technology incubator since the 19th century, and it remains a favored home for start-ups such as eRobotics and its founder Dash Farber. “It’s kind of the main intersection on Route 128,” says the self-described “workaholic,” referring to the technology corridor that rings Boston. “If I have to fire an engineer there’ll be another one along in a few minutes,” he says before turning back to his workbench.
Farber’s Board of Directors likes the location for another reason, however. “There are a lot of networking opportunities here,” says Chip Van Arsdale of Attila Venture Partners, one of eRobotics’ early stage investors. “Dash isn’t the most social person, and he needs to get out and find investors who can buy my stake and make me rich.”
“howsthewife–howsthekids–how’boutthoseredsoxceltics?”
So the Board set a goal that Farber would attend a minimum of one “networking” event a week to forge a “strategic alliance” or find an investment bank that would finance a lucrative “liquidity event” or “exit strategy” before the company burns through the cash from its “A round financing” or runs out of quotation marks.
“Um, you’re dripping oil from your vocalization aperture.”
“It’s a pain in the butt,” says Farber, an introvert whose wardrobe is decidedly low-tech, its highlight being a class ring from MIT featuring a beaver–“Nature’s Engineer”–the school mascot. “I can make more money for those guys working late in my lab. I’d rather let somebody else go clink cocktail glasses.”
As with other tech problems in Farber’s career, it was a late-night flash of inspiration that provided the solution. “I’m sitting there at midnight, still working but exhausted from a boring ‘meet and greet’ session,” he says, “when it struck me I could delegate the mind-numbing task of small talk to subordinates.”
“If I told you I liked your beaver, would you hold it against me?”
So Farber programmed one of the company’s robots to make idle chit-chat at industry functions while he maximizes his time on more productive work. “I call him TekE 3,” Farber says as he drops off a six-foot droid at the Renaissance Inn for the monthly cocktail reception of the Route 128 Emerging Companies Forum. “He’s programmed for three levels of interaction,” Farber says. “He can handle personal–friends and acquaintances; prospects–people who might do the company some good; and ‘lepers.’” What, this reporter asks, is a leper? “It’s somebody who’s a waste of time–you’re always looking over their shoulder trying to break away.”
Family picture on TekE 3’s desk.
The robot rolls past the concierge and into a reception crowded with tech types, financiers and service professionals, stopping only to pick up his name tag. “Hihowareyou,” he says to Jim Frobish, head of acquisitions at Intelligent Assembly Products, a company that makes a proprietary line of whosiwhatsises for manufacturing plants. The two exchange business cards, and TekE launches into ice-breaking sports patter, accessing current standings of Boston teams by a built-in wi-fi card. “How-bout-those-red sox-celtics-huh,” he says in rapid monotone, then waits for Frobish’s reply. “Well, the Sox signed that new pitcher and I’m surprised at how well the Celtics are doing,” the executive says as the robot stifles its automatic yawn reflex.
The two bond immediately, if at a shallow depth, and after promising to follow up with each other, TekE says “nicetomeetyou” and moves in the direction of a man with a loud tie around the neck of his French-cuffed shirt. “moneymoneymoney,” the robot hums as it approach Todd Henrikus, an investment banker at Wharton Pingree Partners.
TekE extends a robotic arm to the thirty-something hot-shot, who hopes to retire before he’s forty and produce films. “What space are you in?” Henrikus asks, and TekE processes the financier’s jargon into English after rejecting “hotel” and “Waltham” as possible responses.
“We don’t see many women at these tech functions!”
“we design and build cutting-edge robotic solutions for a variety of industrial processes,” the robot says, regurgitating boilerplate language from the company’s SEC filings.
“Give me a call, I’ll bring some people up from New York to meet your people,” Henrikus says.
“Sounds super,” TekE says with as much emotion as it can muster with two gigabytes of memory.
The two separate, and TekE scans the room for his next conversation, when his “leper” light begins to flutter, signalling the approach of a professional who will add little value, cost eRobotics money, and gum up the company’s product development.
“Hi,” an over-eager man with glasses says as he grips TekE’s mechanical paw. “Floyd Gargemi, nice to meet you.”
“nice to meet you,” TekE replies, although his mechanical demeanor is more brittle than usual. “what do you do?”
“I’m a lawyer.”
Available in Kindle format on amazon.com as part of the collection “Sci-Fi Kind of Guy.”