The Christmas Song Generator 2018 | HumorOutcasts

The Christmas Song Generator 2018

December 1, 2018

Let’s face it. Some people hate Christmas music.* Other people hate to sing. If you hate to sing and hate Christmas music, this article is for you.

As sure as autumn turns to winter, someone somewhere is going to demand that everyone within earshot join in a Christmas sing-a-long. To avoid the unpleasant consequences that would ensue if you were to refuse outright, including being tagged as a Scrooge or a wet blanket, I suggest the following compromise:

Take the first two or three lines of a bunch of Christmas songs and combine them into one song. Carry enough copies to pass around when the inevitable songfest begins, and make sure to give one to the annoying idiot who is starting it. You can choose any combination of well-known songs in any order you wish.

Before you and the others begin singing, make an agreement with the annoying idiot that singing one or two phrases of a song constitutes singing the whole thing, and said idiot would not make the group sing any part of the song over again.

Here is an example:

A Christmas Song Mash-Up

O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree,
How lovely are thy branches

And on the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
A partridge in a pear tree.

So deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa la la la la la la la la!

With jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse, open sleigh.

And up on the housetop reindeer pause.
Down comes good old Santa Claus.

So we wish you a Merry Christmas,
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
We wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year1

The End.

That is just an example of what you can do with this idea. Get creative! You want to spare yourself the torture of plowing through complete songs, and at the same time impress people with your imagination.

Good luck with this.


*Not me. I love most of it. But that’s a whole other story.

**Being mindful of copyright infringement laws (mindful = scared silly), I did a quick Internet check and picked only songs in the public domain. You’re welcome.

Kathy Minicozzi

Kathy Minicozzi is an opera singer turned aspiring writer, who lives somewhere in New York City. In other words, she's weird, but harmless. She is the author of "Opera for People Who Don't Like It," in which she turns the world of opera and its performers upside down while, at the same time, making it understandable to non-opera lovers and making everyone laugh.

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2 Responses to The Christmas Song Generator 2018

  1. Bill Y "The Legendary Legend" Ledden
    December 2, 2018 at 10:50 am

    I wrap myself in a wet blanket and if anyone asks me to join a sing-a-long, I dive on them!. Strangely enough, I rarely get asked to join sing-a-long’s!

    • December 2, 2018 at 5:18 pm

      Bill Y, the world needs more people like you! LOL!

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