NORAD (North American Defense) Tracks Santa

As of press time, Santa Claus was delivering presents over Tibet. How do we know this? NORAD (North American Defense) tell us . Why does NORAD do this? The official explanation (see below) is that in 1955 Sears accidently gave out the phone number for the CONAD Commander in Chief hotline. Many calls came to this number. The worthy staff decided to run with it and provided “live” updates to all the believing little ones. Staff and kids were so happy about the Santa Claus spotting that it became an annual event.

Yes, 364 days a year NORAD does protect America from nuclear and other threats coming over the North Pole. But on Christmas Eve, this worthy arm of America’s armed forces tracks Santa’s gift-giving trip. Give NORAD’s website, http://www.noradsanta.org a look on December 24. There also a Santa app from NORAD, so you can keep of Santa’s sled even when you’re away from your computer.

noradsanta.org was particularly exciting one year when they showed sightings of Santa by F-14s and other jets. One of the sightings had an Air Force pilot telling how he was providing fighter escort over Rio de Janeiro, I think, for Santa Claus. Egad, chill out people. No sledjacking. They’re enough presents for everyone. Besides NORAD is full of Santa Claus believers and would take a rather dim view of anyone causing Santa any grief.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.

 
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Check out my latest novel, the hilarious apocalyptic thriller, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms? It’s published by HumorOutcasts and is available in paperback or Kindle on amazon.com

 
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