Not to be outdone by the Alabama House of Representatives, which recently approved legislation that would prohibit transgender students from using public school bathrooms that matched their gender identity, Mississippi lawmakers decided today that transgender students must go outside of the state to relieve themselves.
According to Mississippi State Senator Winston “Puff Adder” Cavell, “peeing is a privilege, not a Constitutional right. We’re not saying that transgender students shouldn’t be allowed to pee. All we’re saying is that they shouldn’t be allowed to pee in Mississippi. Simply thinking about this bathroom issue makes my constituents queasy and skittish, and when my constituents get queasy and skittish, they start lynching people. That’s the last thing transgender folks in our state need. Trust me, it would be a lot better for everybody if trans people just took their private parts over the border to Louisiana to ‘do their business’. Hell, anything goes in that Sodom-and-Gomorrah state. Have you been to New Orleans?”