For those who’ve always wondered why the vast majority of female models in fashion magazines look supremely bored or pissed off, there’s now an answer.
Purina Cat Chow.
“Over 93% of top female models subsist on a diet of Purina Cat Chow and coconut water in order to maintain their slim physiques,” says Noreen Chunlow, Professor of Nutrition at Tulane University. “These women look constipated because they ARE constipated. In a typical week they poop less than the weight of a carpenter ant. You’d be pissed off too if that was your life. Ever notice how full-figured models always seem to be smiling? Well, they eat real food.”