Mattel Purchases Red Lobster Restaurant Chain, Will Introduce “Shrimp Barbie” Appetizer on June 1st

The doors of Red Lobster will not be closing after all.  The restaurant chain, which recently declared bankruptcy, has been bought by Mattel, the behemoth toy manufacturer.  One of the first items that Mattel plans to add to the Red Lobster menu is Shrimp Barbie, an appealingly slender crustacean appetizer that will resemble the original Barbie doll.

“This is the first time we’ve marketed Barbie as a food,” notes Steve Totzke, Mattel’s President.  “We’re excited to see how the public responds.”

Critics are not thrilled that children will be able to eat Barbie; they maintain that the whole idea is in bad taste, if not obscene.

“I beg to differ,” says Totzke.  “I’m confident that customers will be amazed at how taste-FULL Barbie can be when she’s dusted with Old Bay Seasoning and served with our mildly spicy Ken Cocktail Sauce.  Folks will be tempted to eat so many Shrimp Barbies that they won’t have any room left for their fish-and-chips!”

Shrimp Barbie will also be available as an entrée


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