Can DNA Prove Bigfoot Exists?

at the Willow Creek Bigfoot Museum © by Bob Doran

European researchers are inviting anyone who thinks they possess “Bigfoot” hair strands to hand them over so they can perform DNA testing to see if the strands help verify the existence of the mythical beast.  Hundreds of people, but surprisingly no Yeti, have offered to send samples to the British scientists conducting this controversial research.

While it’s unsure if DNA will help prove that Bigfoot lives, the samples are expected to confirm several theories already in place: 1) Alcohol plays a key role in how so many people acquired what they think is Bigfoot hair, and coincidentally, claw marks from a grizzly;  2) Even if a man grunts like a beast, passes gas like a beast and scratches like a beast, he is most likely not a beast – at least a Bigfoot beast; and 3) Bigfoot will only be found when someone offers him a multi-million dollar reality show deal which includes a mega wedding to either one of the Kardashian sisters or a Big Fat American Gypsy.

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6 thoughts on “Can DNA Prove Bigfoot Exists?”

  1. As much as I’d like to believe Bigfoot exists, I think it draws the line when it comes to marrying a Kardashian. lol.

  2. I’m going to out on a big limb here and say that I don’t think Bigfoot exists. Now before you ask, I don’t have any proof and like most things, I’m probably wrong but I’ve said it and I hate Bon Jovi.

  3. I think Bigfoot is off somewhere with Santa Claus, the Bogeyman and the Tooth Fairy, laughing about how easy it is to fool people.

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