What do you do if you are known for having the biggest penis in the world? Well, first you get an agent, and then you write a song about the colossal body part.
Jonah Falcon(who by the way is Caucasian and bisexual — and don’t get all offended because you know you were wondering ) is the proud owner of the mammoth penis and somehow, someone found out that Falcon’s 13.5-inch appendage was the Big Kahuna of penises worldwide because I guess Ripley keeps records on this sort of thing?
Anyway, in the past few years, he and his penis have been guests on everything from the Daily Show with Jon Stewart to Law & Order, and Falcon has even been able to ride his penis into doing a weekly sports cable show about the Yankees.
No one can say that Falcon has not used his penis for growth opportunities. Represented by one of the top agents of porn star actors, Falcon has taken his career and body part to new lengths with a just released song about his penis called, “It’s so Big”. Available on iTunes, the song speaks to the challenges Falcon faces each day living with a very noticeable bulge.
I give Falcon credit. Some men might try and cover up their manhood, but Falcon shows it off with pride and has erected an entire showbiz career around it. So, what are the lessons learned here?
First: Good things do not necessarily come in small packages
Second: Big dreams can indeed come true
Third: Always stay humble because the bigger you are; the harder you fall