Keeping It Real

I bumped into an ex-girlfriend and we had a laugh, reminiscing about the surreal old days. I asked if she wanted to grab a coffee and she picked up her phone and logged on to an app. The app told her that she last had a coffee in 2003. She was on a diet so there was no way she could have another one, so soon after. I told her about Jill Y and that we had an imaginary son and daughter. She said she would never have imagined that I would be a father of one, yet alone two imaginary kids. I told her that we’re pretty cool parents and that we learned about parenting from Comedians on TV shows:


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12 thoughts on “Keeping It Real”

  1. I taught myself how to hit a baseball. My Mom never did get around to teaching me how to change a tire on a car. I still don’t know how to do that.

  2. Imaginary children…genius! Imaginary billions, imaginary luxury, my life just got made. Your mom’s wisdom reminded me of the time I asked Dave Barry, “So what do you think of humor based on stereotypes?” and he said, “Leave it to a woman to ask a question like that.”

    1. Ah it’s not all good Don Don’s. They don’t get me anything for Father’s Day!

  3. I need an app that tells me that all the Starbucks should be mine. Sometimes I doubt myself and I need positive reinforcement.

    1. Another option would be to open a coffee house and only sell coffee to yourself. The word would soon get around that you own a coffee house but only sell coffee to yourself. This would create massive queues outside the door and eventually you would sell vat loads of coffee. You’re welcome!

    1. I know, I totally rock. I’m thinking about setting up The Bill Y Foundation For The Massively Confused. Y’know, to give back even more.

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