My 2-year-old just shouted, “What the hell?!” I’d be mad, but she said it when we ran out of Cheez-Its, so it seemed appropriate.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2014
4-year-old: Why don’t you ever grow a beard? Me: I prefer to be clean-shaven. 4: Is it because you’re a girl?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2014
Me: *puts on Axe body spray* What do you think? 4-year-old: Why do you make my nose sad?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2014
4-year-old: What if there are monsters in my room? What I should’ve said: That’s silly What I did say: Your death will be quick & painless
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2014
4-year-old: Why don’t we have a goat? Me: We don’t live on a farm. 4: Me: 4: Why are you bad at life?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 10, 2014
From http://t.co/HTDVyr8D7T 4/17/14: pic.twitter.com/ZhNhwph4Ss
— James Breakwell (@James_Breakwell) October 4, 2014