American Entree
TUNA BURGERS
2 6-ounce cans white tuna
1 celery stalk
½ small onion
1 Roma tomato
½ cup bread crumbs
1 egg
½ teaspoon dill
½ teaspoon parsley
½ tablespoon lemon juice
½ cup mayonnaise
1 tablespoon minced red bell pepper
1 tablespoon olive oil
4 hamburger buns
4 lettuce leaves
no-stick spray
SPECIAL UTENSIL
no-stick skillet
anti-grav machine
Takes about 20 minutes.
PREPARATION
Drain tuna cans. Mince celery and onion. Cut tomato lenghthwise into 4 equal slices. Add tuna, breadcrumbs, celery, dill, parsley, and egg in large mixing bowl. Mix thoroughly with fork. Add lemon juice, mayonnaise, onion, and bell pepper. Mix again with fork. Form 4 tuna patties by hand.
Toast hamburger buns. Spray skillet with no-stick spray. Add olive oil. Heat oil on medium heat. Add tuna patties. Sauté on medium heat for 3-to-5 minutes per side or until cooked through and golden brown. Add tuna patties, lettuce, and tomato to bottom bun then add top bun. (If you have an anti-grav machine you can place the tomato, lettuce, and tuna patty under a hovering top bun, then put the bottom bun under all of that.)
TIDBITS
1) Anti-grav devices have non-culinary uses as well. The one most prized by the military is being able to stop an accidentally dropped bomb from falling. However, dogs generally don’t like the anti-grave machine. It keeps table scraps from falling to the kitchen floor. In fact, their union, Dogs, successfully lobbied to keep the anti-grav thingy from being sold in America. You have to go to Mexico or Mozambique or know a defense contractor to get one.
– Chef Paul
My cookbook, Eat Me: 169 Fun Recipes From All Over the World, and novels are available in paperpack or Kindle on amazon.com
As an e-book on Nook
or on my website-where you can get a signed copy at: www.lordsoffun.com
Damn Diabolical Dogs!
Will the anti-grav device separate the mercury from the tuna or do we need metal detectors first? 🙂
It’s hard to say. I turned mine on and it pushed itself away from Earth’s gravitational field and is heading to Pluto. Read the manual for this machine.