Ignorance. Your Ticket To The Big Money


I think I’ve figured out a way to work toward social justice AND make a ton of money. Talk to any teacher or a social worker and you’ll realize that this is not an easy thing to do. My idea came to me after reading about an incident at a Denny’s in Los Angeles. A couple went there to eat, but was told that they would have to pay first before their food arrived. The couple was black and the restaurant manager was worried that they’d dine and dash. Yes, everyone knows that black people do this all the time. It’s why they’re such great athletes – they get tons of training dining and dashing during their formative years.

This type of ignorance can work in both your favor and that of people sick of dealing with the species racist ignoramitus. The L.A. Denny’s and its manager are getting sued and will probably pay out big time. So here’s my simple, three-step program:

  1. Form a partnership with one lawyer and two people sick of being on the receiving end of racism.
  1. Head to a business that has a track record of settling discrimination lawsuits.
  1. Film and record the incident. Split settlement money four ways. Repeat as needed.

Here’s an example of the program in action:

You team up with two American citizens who also happen to be Sikh. They dress up in traditional attire, but wear a wire beneath their clothes. While waiting to board the plane they get into a heated “argument”, speaking in a non-English language. Everyone boards the plane. But you know what’s coming next, right? Yup, someone from the Heartland goes up to the flight attendant and says that your partners are “making them uncomfortable”. So the flight attendant asks your partners to leave the plane; BAM! you’ve now got a winning lawsuit on your hands. To celebrate, your partners can walk off the plane singing “We’re in the money, the sky is sunny!”

In this era of social media, no airline wants the nickname Racist Air. Even United Airlines. So they’ll settle quickly. Unlike the after-the-fact lawsuits that keep popping up, this system is proactive and puts the racists on the defensive. You and your friends get rich while also making the world a far better place. What could be more American than that?

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3 thoughts on “Ignorance. Your Ticket To The Big Money”

  1. There’s no justice in the way that teens eat all of the ring dings. And while we’re at it, they make me uncomfortable sometimes too. Do you think I have a case?

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