Part of a librarian’s job is helping people find a book that they’ve read or heard about. But sometimes our patrons get the title wrong. For instance? The woman who came to the library asking for a copy of “The Night Weasel.”
What book did she actually want? Night, by Elie Wiesel.
Here’s a list of actual messed-up book titles people have asked librarians for:
Hillbilly Allergy
The Great Raspy
Downtown Abbey
Less Miss Rabbles
Where the Crayfish Are
Nap of a Salesman
The Killer Mockingbird
The Count of Monte Crisco
Catcher in the Pie
Pride and Prejudice, by Erica Jong.
The Brothers Carry Matzoh
The Clan of the Care Bears
The Communist Manifestation
The Satanic Vices
Anne of the Seven Gables
Henry Winkler and the Chocolate Factory
Diarrhea of a Wimpy Kid
To Kill a Mockingjay
Grape Expectations
Madam’s Ovaries
A Sale of Two Titties
Crazy With Asians
Any book by Willa Catheter
If you can’t remember the exact title of the book you want? Not to worry. We can usually figure out what you’re looking for. And we promise not to crack a smile — until after you’ve left the library.
( Roz Warren is the author of two collections of library and book-related humor, Our Bodies, Our Shelves: A Collection of Library Humor, and Just Another Day At Your Local Public Library, both of which would make great gifts for your favorite librarian or other bookish friend.)
Hilarious. My favorites are Clan of the Care Bears and Madame’s Ovaries.