Paypal Goes Interplanetary

By: Raven Vasquez

With at least one Mars colony underway and plans for an outer space hotel in the works,  one of the most important questions being asked is “How will people shop when bouncing around the universe?”

Well, worry no more. Paypal is there to meet the needs of intergalactic shoppers.   Paypal Galactic (yes, that is its true name) is partnering  with SETI, an organization that searches for extraterrestrial life, to assure future star trekkers that they can still find their much beloved bargains no matter what rock in the heavens they call home.

Although practical applications for outer space shopping are still about a decade away , Paypal and scientists believe that questions about currency and financial transactions need to be addressed and answered before humans have the ability take off to vacation and live in worlds unknown.  Space law firms are also sizing up how to legislate finance in the universe.  Is anyone surprised that lawyers are already involved?

Anyway, paying for goods in outer space is not the only obstacle facing intergalactic shoppers. Another major concern is how will the out-of-world travelers get their merchandise?  In an effort to meet this challenge,  the top delivery services are also rumored to be sta rbound. Insiders say UPS  will have its Universe Parcel Service and FedEx will have S-S SEx or Super Space Service Express.

The final piece of the puzzle for intergalactic shopping lies in the ability to have reliable internet access so space travelers can browse their favorite stores and purchase the items they need.  Both Verizon and XFinity have stepped up to the plate.  Verizon promises that everyone will be able to shop via smartphone although long distance and roaming rates might apply which even they admit could get expensive.  Xfinity assures future customers that they will provide their space cable customers with the same quality customer service they do their Earth-bound customers.  All scheduled installations will occur between the  hours of 7-11 AM and 2-6 PM– every four years.

“Four years isn’t that long,”  an XFinity spokesperson commented.  “That is almost where we are now on Earth. If you want to use our services, sign up early.”

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5 thoughts on “Paypal Goes Interplanetary”

  1. If Kathy can do it, so can I; If Paypal intends to do business with other-worldly beings, it should partner with YETI not SETI!

  2. What an out-of-this-world idea!

    (Sorry. I couldn’t resist, and I had to be the first one to say that.)

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