Come For The Great Gatsby, Stay For The Sardines

Library patrons often bring coffee, soda or chips to the library where I work to snack on. But some patrons nosh on more surprising things. For instance? Here are a few of the food items librarians tell me they’ve recently found in their libraries:

Sardines.

A full bottle of vodka chilling in the toilet tank in the men’s room.

A box of fruit snacks, shelved like a book.

A can of artichoke hearts.

A bottle of real ketchup mixed in with the containers of pretend food in the junior room’s play kitchen.

Trail mix in the computer keyboards.

A banana in the book drop.

A slice of cheese as a book mark.

Chopped broccoli.

“The other day we found a plugged-in crock pot cooking something in the lobby. It smelled amazing.”

“We once had a patron plug in a blender and start making herself a smoothie. She was flummoxed when we told her that she couldn’t do that.”

A pile of onion peels on the floor by the new book display.

An empty Cool Whip container in the teen section with three spoons in it,

An entire rotisserie chicken on the counter in the bathroom.

Half a can of Vienna Sausage in a ficus tree.

Chicken bones stashed under the chair cushions

A large uneaten pizza sitting on a table in the quiet study section, We don’t know how it got there and nobody ever claimed it.

A cabbage.

A bowl of Fruit Loops.

A pineapple.

You can come to your local public library to sate your hunger for knowledge. Or your hunger for cheese, artichoke hearts and Fruit Loops. Either way, we’ll always be happy to see you.

(Roz Warren is the author of OUR BODIES, OUR SHELVES: A COLLECTION OF LIBRARY HUMOR  and JUST ANOTHER DAY AT YOUR LOCAL PUBLIC LIBRARY)

Share this Post:

6 thoughts on “Come For The Great Gatsby, Stay For The Sardines”

  1. Roz, we had a person who liked to make liverwurst sandwiches in the study carrels. Like he didn’t think we would smell it? He was always bringing in sandwich makings, smelly cheese was also a favorite.

  2. It’s just amazing what happens in libraries, Roz. You have opened my eyes. When I go into any local library now, I see it differently. Still love them, but I realize there’s a lot going on.

Comments are closed.