This is a real sign outside a pizza place in Oaxaca, Mexico.
Possible captions for it:
1- Um…..just what sort of meat did you say was on that?
2- Yes, you do have a great talent with that machete, but did you have to decapitate my girlfriend in the process of slicing the pizza??????
3- Why does this tomato sauce taste real icky?
4- Just because you were a famous masked movie star once doesn’t mean you are anything great now. Please just get over yourself and give us our pie!
5- Yes! Yes! Yes!
We will definitely remember to leave you a tip! No problem at all!
6- You say you wear the mask because the person who trained you had a lousy aim?!
7- Um, actually Halloween isn’t for another 6 months. I know it’s a fun holiday but nobody I know of starts celebrating it in May!
8- No, that was William Tell who sliced the apple off his son’s head and he actually used a crossbow to do it. And, ‘No!’, you cannot demonstrate your skill on my son!
9- No, we had wanted it sliced in four pieces, we had said. So why don’t you scoot along and get us a new one?
10- No, Reginald, trying to get out of the damage you have just done with offering us a free two day old pizza isn’t going to clear this mess away!
11- Umm, It’s really nice that you are offering freshly slaughtered meat for this, but don’t you think it should maybe be cooked first?
12- No, BEEF sausage, NOT pork sausage! And we want it kosher too! You think you can handle that?
13- The pizza is already cut- why do you need the machete………oh, oh………..
14- Self-inflicted circumcision is never a good idea……oh, too late now, you say….
- No, I don’t have any bandages. Why do you ask?