Seswaa and Botswanan Stand-Up Comics

Botswanan Entree

SESWAA
(Stewed Beef)

INGREDIENTS

1 onion
1¾ pounds brisket or slow-cooking beef
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
3 bay leaves
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon salt

SPECIAL UTENSILS

large, oven-safe pot
kitchen mallet

PREPARATION

Preheat oven to 310 degrees. Dice onion. Add onion, brisket and vegetable oil to oven-safe pot.) If needed, cut brisket into pieces so that it will fit.) Sauté on medium-high heat for 10 minutes or until meat is brown and onion is soft.

Add bay leaves, pepper, salt, and enough water to cover ingredients. Increase heat to high, cover, and bring to boil. Place pot in oven. Bake in oven at 310 degrees for 2-to-3 hours or until brisket is quite tender. Remove brisket and place on chopping board or hard surface. Pound the brisket with mallet until meat is flaky and flattened. (This is a really good time to take out your frustrations. Remember when your Five-Layer Chicken Florentine lost to lutefisk at the state fair? Pound! Pound! Pound! Or … prepare in the presence of your no-good significant other. It sends a salutary message.)

Ahem. Return flaky, flattened brisket to pot. Reduce heat to low-medium and simmer for 1 hour 15 minutes or until liquid cooks off. Remove from oven. Remove brisket from pot. Serve with vegetables, polenta, or corn-meal porridge.) And my gosh, leftover Seswaa goes great with melted mozzarella and hamburger buns.

TIDBITS

1) The people of Bostwana are called Batswana, but an individual from there is called a Mostwana. Sometimes people are called by their first names. The most popular name for a boy in Botswana is Sammy. The most popular name for a girl there is a tie between Precious and Lesego. Botswana’s currency has the most exciting name in the world., the pula which means rain. While Botswana has thriving diamond and tourist industries, it also has high unemployment.

3) Such are the most exciting facts I found for Botswana. Clearly, the country needs to loosen up. It should use its diamond revenues to employ 200,000 stand-up comics. This would make Botswana the world’s humor capital. Let’s bring this about. Together, we shall make the world laugh.

– Chef Paul