A Threesome Minus a Twosome Equals Jail Time

I am not sure if Emily Post ever discussed the correct etiquette for this situation but maybe the modern “Manners Gurus” can tackle it.  A 44-year-old woman in Friendship, Maine is in jail because she pulled a knife on two men after their proposed “threesome” did not take place.  Yes, the woman had made arrangements with the two gentlemen who lived “a few trailers over”, to have a ménage a trois. Unfortunately, the men failed to fulfill their end of the bargain and the woman got ticked off, pulled out a knife and threatened to kill them.  So, they called the police.

While this story does not shock me, there are three points of interest I wish to address:

This incident took place in Friendship, Maine. How ironic that this proposed ménage a trois and subsequent knife threat happened in a town that sounds so welcoming and platonic.  For God’s sake, this is the land of Jessica Fletcher and Cabot Cove and George and Barbara Bush and the Kennebunkport wealthy. Murder and deceit I can fathom, but  trailer park threesomes?  Apparently, there is more to this cold state than a rocky coastline.

Is anyone else not shocked that this event took place in a trailer park?  I won’t belabor the point, but  I am starting to understand why God sends tornadoes to trailer parks first.

Finally, I think it would behoove this obviously horny woman to have a Plan C to satisfy her sexual appetite when her Plan A and Plan B turn chicken and decide not to show up.  Might I suggest a small motorized device and a lot of Energizer batteries?   It wouldn’t cost much, and  I am sure that with one push of the ON switch, a lot of her “problems” would disappear as would the problems of her neighbors in the trailer park.  Hey, Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Anyone care to make a donation?