Angel’s First Morning (from “Angel Pays a Visit”) | HumorOutcasts

Angel’s First Morning (from “Angel Pays a Visit”)

January 15, 2016


Along with the miracles comes a little mayhem.”

This spec script is based on the poetry books of Carolyn Elkins.

Previously: After Cissy, in despair, called out to the universe for help, Angel appeared in her attic. After he convinces Cissy she’s not insane, she invites him to stay.



Angel stands at glass patio doors staring out at the sunrise. A bright aura envelops him, especially his head and hands. The cat sits next to Angel’s feet and also is looking out. Cissy peeks around the corner and sees Angel.


Oh, God. Oh my God. You really are here. I still can’t believe it.

Angel and the cat in synchronization turn their heads toward Cissy.


Believe it, Cissy.


Can you tone down the light a little?


Of course. Sorry.

Angel’s aura dims away. Cissy steps cautiously into the kitchen, looks Angel up and down and stares at him for a time. After a few seconds, Angel plays along with the inspection by presenting himself, both arms extended in a flourish, and then by turning slowly around like a model.


What should I call you?


You could call me my name.


What is your name?

Angel makes an incredible otherworldly loud noise: roaring, booming, trumpeting‒reminiscent of the mermaid saying her name in Splash. Amidst this din are the barely discernible sounds of “mal’akh Elohim, mal’akh Adonai.” The cat runs out of the room.


Very funny. Now what should I call you?

Angel waves his hand at the radio on the kitchen counter, and the song “Just Call Me Angel of the Morning” comes on but stops after 5 syllables.


OK. Angel it is. So how long are you going to be here, Angel?


(in Capt. Kirk’s voice)

These are the adventures of the U.S.S. Angel, his several-week mission, to enter the strange world of Cissy Aiken, to bring her to new life, new faith, new joy–to boldly take her where no man has taken her before. Ooo-OOOOH! Ooo oo ooo ooo ooooooo.


That’s your answer?


(seriously now)

I’m here until you’re helped . . . or Christmas, whichever comes first. We all have to be home for Christmas.


All? There are more of you?

Angel, à la Dan Aykroyd in Ghostbusters, gestures “of course.


You never studied.

Bill Spencer

Bill Spencer's humor writing has been published by Funny Times, Narrative magazine, Reader's Digest, The Sun, The Inconsequential, Clever magazine, Defenestration, The Short Humour Site, Hobo Pancakes, and Nuthouse. He has also published scholarly articles on the novels of Cormac McCarthy and is co-author of an unproduced screenplay, "Angel Pays a Visit." He lives in a cabin in the mountains of North Carolina with his wife, artist-poet Carolyn Elkins.

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8 Responses to Angel’s First Morning (from “Angel Pays a Visit”)

  1. Bill Y Ledden
    January 17, 2016 at 10:35 am

    I was so not expecting the Capt. Kirk voiceover. Genius is what it is.

    • Bill Spencer
      January 17, 2016 at 1:20 pm

      Angel thinks Star Trek is out of this world.

  2. January 15, 2016 at 2:21 pm

    An angel that can call forth Angel Of The Morning is truly talented!

    • Bill Spencer
      January 15, 2016 at 2:55 pm

      He has skills.

  3. January 15, 2016 at 2:17 pm

    You’re really killing me with this one page at a time. I’m thinking you’re a bit devilish getting us to come to HO every day here. You and Donna planned this,didn’t you?!?

    • Bill Spencer
      January 15, 2016 at 2:54 pm

      Angel says the best things in life—like cake—are best savored one byte at a time.

  4. January 15, 2016 at 8:46 am

    This is wonderful! I can’t ignore the fact that Captain Kirk makes at least a voiceover appearance?

    • Bill Spencer
      January 15, 2016 at 9:28 am

      Angel is a Star Trek fan. But, then, who isn’t?

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