Child-Proof Food Containers

Go ahead. Make my day.
Okay. I can understand why medicine bottles are made hard to open. Children get into everything, and we don’t want them to experiment with medications they have no business taking. So yes, medicine bottles should be hard to open, at least for kids.

But food? Why on earth should a jar of food be impossible to open without a chainsaw?

Take, for example, that new jar of peanut butter that you are trying to open because, let’s say, you are making lunch for a couple of kids. You start with confidence, sure that one good twist of the wrist will loosen up the lid.

The lid refuses to budge. You heave a sigh and try again. The thing remains stubbornly tight.

After uttering a couple of mild curses, you bang the lid against the countertop a couple of times. Then you try again to open the jar, with no luck.

You wrap a kitchen towel around the jar and try again. Nothing happens.

You take a table knife and tap the entire circumference of the lid with it. That has no effect, either.

You run the hot water in the sink until it gets really hot, then you put the jar lid under the flow and hold it there for a minute. You take it out and try to open it again. Try is the operative word because again nothing happens.

You try the kitchen towel and the banging against the counter tricks again. By this time, you want to throw the damned jar out the window.

You set the jar on the counter, having decided to make baloney sandwiches instead.

After you make and pack the baloney sandwiches, you try once more to open the jar of peanut butter, just for the hell of it.

This time you manage to open it.

That is the end of this story, as far as I am concerned.

For more of my humor, go to Kathy’s World

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4 thoughts on “Child-Proof Food Containers”

  1. My son is 31 years old and living in California. I am 65 years old and I live, happily, all by myself. NOTHING in my home needs to be child proof. And yet so much of it is.

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