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Skirt Chaser

September 13, 2011
By
Skirt Chaser

If you’re a skirt chaser, you’re in for a big surprise in Scotland.

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Did Ron Jaworski’s On Air Slip Warrant an Apology?

September 13, 2011
By

So, Ron Jaworski said the “S” word on the air last night while broadcasting Monday Night Football on ESPN.  I didn’t even notice it. That probably means I either watch too much cable or I…

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After Divorce

September 12, 2011
By

If they made a movie about my life after divorce, it would be called Free Willy.

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I Am Woman

September 12, 2011
By
I Am Woman

I am in a deadline writing cycle which basically means for two weeks I work all the time and nothing around me gets done unless I can get it done without leaving my computer for…

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Order in the Court (Chamber)

September 12, 2011
By

The gavel slammed down so hard, the sound reverberated throughout the tight chamber. Judge Pastel screamed, ORDER! The room quieted. The defendant made his case, “You have no idea what I’m going through, Your Honor.…

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Second Job Opportunities in a Struggling Economy?

September 12, 2011
By

Last Tuesday evening my midget friend (Roger) and I went down to that new bar that just opened on Oak Street, named the “Liver–B-Gone”. The pub used to be called “The Evil People” until the…

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Europe, I Think

September 9, 2011
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I’ve never actually been to Europe, but I think I know a lot about it from what I’ve seen on TV. There’s no mistaking that they’re pretty backwards compared to the technologically advanced United States…

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Nightmare at Macy’s

September 9, 2011
By
DreamsCartoon

YOU’RE WALKING DOWN a crowded street and to your horror, you notice the people looking at you and laughing. They’re pointing at your nether regions and when you look down, you notice that you are…

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Friday Humor Devotional

September 9, 2011
By
Friday Humor Devotional

  Dear Lord, do not  judge me for what I’m about to receive.  It’s not often she volunteers to give me a blow job, Amen.

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Guilt, Charities and Tastykake Krimpets

September 9, 2011
By
Guilt, Charities and Tastykake Krimpets

TastyKake revealed © by SanFranAnnie Another charity called while I was eating dinner last night.  I used to be on a no-solicitation list, but I guess that list has expired because solicitors are calling almost…

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Silence Is (truly) Golden

September 9, 2011
By

If a man says something in the woods and there’s no woman around to hear him . . . is he still wrong, doesn’t love you anymore, never takes you anywhere, forgets to put the…

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A White Man’s Guide to the History of Rap Music

September 9, 2011
By

Prepare to Have Your Nizzle Shizzled, Bro! Having grown up on the mean streets of white suburbia, I have always kind of been a little on the edge which has kept me in tune with…

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Sending the Wrong Message?

September 8, 2011
By
Sending the Wrong Message?

Billboard on a major U.S. highway coming into Denton, Texas   This is only funny until it isn’t.  All it takes is the wrong depressed individual to see this on the worst day of their…

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Sleepless in Texas

September 8, 2011
By
Sleepless in Texas

Dear PeakLife, manufacturer of Somnapure, please quit utilizing lovely looking and busty women to get me to click onto your on-line ads that claim they are an “all natural sleep aid [that’s] helping thousands of Americans…

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I’ll Have What She’s Having

September 7, 2011
By
I’ll Have What She’s Having

  restaurants in kitchener waterloo © by arabesque cafe I have a psychological disorder. Many of my friends have speculated this for years. And in my defense, they were presumptuous. I’ve checked the “Diagnostic and…

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An Interview Tip

September 7, 2011
By

When you’re interviewing, and they ask where you see yourself in 5 years, saying “in your strong arms” probably won’t get you the job.

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A Tale of Two Weddings

September 7, 2011
By
A Tale of Two Weddings

A newlywed couple in central Pennsylvania was arrested for shoplifting more than $1,000 worth of “finger food” from a Wegman’s Supermarket. Apparently, the food was for their wedding reception.  Hell, I am not judging these…

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My Daily Prayer

September 6, 2011
By

Dear God, Grant me the serenity to accept that which I cannot change with ritual murder and sacrifices to the devil. Amen.

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How Not To Play Twister

September 6, 2011
By

Trust me, don’t play Twister with someone who has a prosthetic leg, you’ll never win.

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My Dad always said Big Girls need Lovin’ Too, But this is Ridiculous!

September 6, 2011
By

This has been an interesting week at the trailer park. We had a couple of very large women move in three trailers down from us. The bigger of the two weighs about 300 and has…

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What to Name a Baby? How About Toilet?

September 5, 2011
By

I’ve always been fascinated with names – why parents choose the names they choose, why people change the names their parents choose for them, and why anybody would give their babies names that are –…

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New Release
How to Write and Share Humor
By Donna Cavanagh Published by HumorOutcasts Press

Available in Paperback and Kindle


New Release
The Astounding Misadventures of Rory Collins
By Brian Kiley and HumorOutcasts Press

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New Release
Rats, Mice, And Other Things You Can't Take to The Bank: An Inspirational Collection of Essays from Humorous to Simply Human
By Leslie Handler. and HumorOutcasts Press

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