10. What was I thinking? Nobody wants a president named Mitt.
9. I should’ve promised everyone who voted for me I’d buy them a pony.
8. In hindsight, that Win A Dream Date With Mitt contest was a bad idea.
7. I shouldn’t have picked a running mate with crazy, serial killer eyes.
6. I’ve got a great idea for a sitcom starring me, Jeremy and that Kerry Ladka dude.
5. Maybe it was a little too cocky to only have one speech prepared and all it said was “Get your ass outta my new house, bitch.”
4. On the bright side, a lot of people in poor countries will get to wear the “President Romney” hats and T-shirts.
3. “By creating 15 million new jobs. Duh.” probably wasn’t the best answer to “How are you going to create 15 million new jobs for America?”
2. I really should’ve left Big Bird out of it. Never, ever mess with Big Bird.
And the number one thing Mitt Romney was thinking last night after conceding:
1. Fuck it, I’m having a Coke.
14 thoughts on “Top Ten Things Mitt Romney Was Thinking Last Night After Conceding”
Hehe! Very funny!
Thank you, Kathy!
Love it!!! You are so funny!
HA HA HA HA! I love #3. Very funny stuff Mario!!
Thanks, Deb! And congratulations on your book!
Love #2. Never mess with Big Bird, indeed!
Big Bird is straight up hardcore gangsta. Sesame Street represent yo.
So very funny! Will you send this to Mitt to cheer him up?
Only if he buys me a pony!
I’m so happy that it’s over, and I bet, deep down, so is Mitt!
I’m happy it’s over too. I am so sick and tired of all the political ads on TV. Oh, and I approve this comment.
Great stuff, and #4 is so true.
Thank you, sir. Glad you enjoyed it.
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