Eclectic Documentaries Ken Burns Could Make and I’ll Watch Because He’s an Amazing Storyteller

Amy Abbott

1. Stripping wallpaper.
2. Microscopic close-up of a bunionectomy.
3. Narration of vacation pictures to the Agriculture Hall in Fame in Bonner Springs, Kansas at the Lions Club.
4. Narration of vacation pictures to the Agriculture Hall in Fame in Bonner Springs, Kansas, via FaceTime.
5. Cicada reproduction.
6. Gilbert Gottfried reading the entirety of “Bleak House” while dressed as Barney Rubble from “The Flintstones.”
7. Dog owners picking up the morning deposit while walking pets.
8. Men at my gym competing over prostate trouble stories
9. Remaking “Ishtar” in New Jersey with the cast of “Dumb and Dumber.”
10. Training session for multi-level marketing product that whitens teeth, invigorates love life, and cures all.
11. Removing dryer lint.

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