Way back in 2006 the Klu Klux Klan distributed flyers on cars around town, during our annual Chain O’ Lakes Festival. The more I thought of it, the more I was reminded of a quote from the movie “Two Weeks Notice”:
“You’re the most annoying person on earth.”
“Well, that’s just silly – have you met everyone on earth?”
I don’t know everyone on earth. I don’t even know everyone on American Idol, so I can’t really saddle any group with a character trait. But in the case of the Klan, I’m willing to make an exception.
The Boys in/of White visited Albion in 2006 with their cheerful message of hate and intolerance. You could say they skulked around, since no one actually saw them placing flyers on all the cars but the black ones. However, since Albion is mostly white, you can see how they could blend in. Very few people of color join that organization, despite the KKK’s nifty free dry cleaning policy.
Now, let’s be fair to the Klan. All they want is a safe, free society for themselves and everyone else who’s exactly like them. Really, how are they any worse than the Nazis, or the Nation of Islam, or anyone who yells “death to (your choice of country here)”? It’s all in perspective: Hitler was nice to animals, and Saddam Hussein used to sing lullabies to small children before having their parents tortured.
Besides, this particular flyer targets only homosexuality and illegal immigration, so hey – I guess nobody else has anything to worry about, huh?
In some ways, the flyer’s not too different from many others you might find under your windshield wipers. There’s an invitation to subscribe to their newsletter, “Thoughts Under the Hood”, for the low, low rate of $16 a year:
“How to find a good home in an all-white neighborhood! A guide to throwing great parties without letting the riff-raff in! Part 3 of tips for removing blood stains from white clothing!”
Let’s hope no one mixes that newsletter up with “Thought IN the Hood”, which is an entirely different animal. Talk about embarrassing.
There’s also a request for donations, because “We’re not funded by the government” (Finally, the government does something right). They need extra money for hair gel. No, seriously – two hours of burning crosses on a hot night can give a person a serious case of hat hair.
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| My grandfather didn’t slog his way across Europe so you bozos over here could pull the same crap. |
The flyer declares: “Notice there is family morals that need to be brought back to our family.” Family morals, but apparently not grammar. How sad – and they give such powerful speeches, too. Well, they say Abraham Lincoln was a lousy speller.
Um, maybe this would be a bad time to bring up Lincoln.
Some of the flyer actually made me chuckle, in that ironic way I have just before throwing small objects across the room. The KKK, of all organizations, actually mentions the Pledge of Allegiance? You know, the one that says One Nation – Indivisible – With Liberty and Justice for All? What’s more divisive than the Klan?
Okay, the Presidential race, but otherwise what? Oh, sure, college basketball – could we get back to the point?
Here’s the part I like the best. This KKK flyer, which is dedicated partially to an anti-gay rant, starts with “The Cape Crusaiders rides once again in the state of Indiana.”
Come on. Everybody knows Batman and Robin were flaming homosexuals. Whoever wrote this thing was having some fun with their Klan buddies, maybe hinting at what he thinks they should really be doing under the sheets.
Maybe we have something in common. I’m against illegal immigration, I’m a patriot, and I think children should be taught family values and good morals. I’m just like those Klan guys in so many ways, including a poor grip on grammar, with one little exception: I think –
No.
I KNOW — every single person should be judged on their own merits. Their accomplishments, their failings, their crimes, their contributions to or damage to society. If I changed the color of my skin (I’m told that’s now possible), I’d be the same person. Except darker. It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to understand the common sense of that.
Or, in the case of our Men in White, a brain donor.
Speaking of skin color, I find it highly ironic that, at the top of the KKK flyer, is a picture of the American flag – along with the words, “These colors will never bleed”.
Ironic. And sad, because these brain donors didn’t see the irony.
My father’s infantry division went by Dachau right after the prison gates were opened. He saw emaciated people staggering about. Can we never learn?
It doesn’t seem so. My grandpa went ashore at Normandy, but not on the first day–he was in a unit that documented, identified, and buried the dead. I think I’d just as soon been on the front lines.