4-year-old: What happens when you die? Me: You go to heaven. 4: No, I mean when you die, do I get your stuff?
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 2, 2014
4-year-old: Dad? Me: What? I’m trying to sleep. 4: Me: 4: What’s the phone number for the firefighters? Now I’m awake.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 2, 2014
Me: I brought home Oreos. Wife: That does NOT count as date night. Me: They’re double-stuffed. Wife: *takes off pants*
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 3, 2014
4-year-old: Do potatoes go to heaven? Me: What? 4: Do they? Me: 4: Me: 4: Me: Only the good ones. The bad ones get turned into vodka.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 2, 2014
My 4-year-old just called something “rad.” Apparently I’m raising a character from a 1990s skateboarding movie.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 2, 2014
Originally posted on http://t.co/HTDVyr8D7T 3/4/14: pic.twitter.com/kKLwWTrVHd
— James Breakwell (@James_Breakwell) August 25, 2014
double stuffed oreos. omg
You were the first thing I read this morning and it made my sleepy eyes crinkle with a smile. Ah, those moments with your mini Yoda….