First you wake up screaming. Then you turn on the light, take a deep breath (and a couple of Valium) and play Bad Dream Bingo.
Bingo Card is here:
Roz Warren is the author of OUR BODIES, OUR SHELVES: LIBRARY HUMOR.
Sometimes people are difficult because they feel vulnerable. Try to sound sympathetic: “I understand you’re being difficult because you’re feeling inadequate right now. I’d feel…
The camera adds ten pounds. That’s why, when you get your picture taken, you should wear bigger clothes. Find more dubious advice in I Used…
First you wake up screaming. Then you turn on the light, take a deep breath (and a couple of Valium) and play Bad Dream Bingo.
Bingo Card is here:
Roz Warren is the author of OUR BODIES, OUR SHELVES: LIBRARY HUMOR.
Roz Warren, who writes for everyone from The New York Times to The Funny Times, is the author of Our Bodies, Our Shelves: Library Humor and Just Another Day At Your Local Public Library: An Insider's Tales of Library Life, both of which you should buy immediately.
More Posts - Website - Twitter - Facebook
Tags: affairs, bad dream bingo, Bears, bingo, humor, humoroutcasts, monsters, nightmares, Our Bodies, Our Shelves, President Trump, Roz Warren, sexting, Tsunami
Sharing.
Ugh the bear one makes me nervous about camping!
Haha!! Too funny. I must say, from an Australian point of view, ‘President Trump’ is a super scary thought. Just can’t imagine him as the leader of the U.S of A. I’m going to have to Google ‘Joyce Carol Oates’.
OMG I’m glad I’m not going to sleep yet. Those are all my worst nightmares!
Hilarious………and a fit scary! My Mom used to love playing bingo. I once went to the Indian Reservation with her….she took 7 cards. I had a hard time following 2! Her cards never looked like this!
I meant a bit not fit……….grrrrr……………….. typing too fast!
Too many to mention. I don’t like playing this game!
Oh yikes, the ghost coming to get me is scary enough! I’ve had that nightmare one too many times lol.
Sounds about right. Some nights are an experience— in hell.
Hah! Now I’m going to have nightmares for sure.
Too many to count here! Thunder storm starting. Over and out! Cheers.
BINGO! I won several ways. Too fun.
I show up at high school, many years after the fact, in my pajamas.
President Trump is a gimme. Even his own party’s leaders detest him.
My own nightmares tend to run more towards President Hillary Clinton, but President Trump isn’t exactly a wet dream, either. The worst nightmare is both of them getting nominations and having to choose between them.
Wow, Roz — what an impressive nightmare list! The Joyce Carol Oates mention was especially hilarious. I’m wondering if she writes a novel a day, 365 a year — with a one-day break every four years on Leap Day?
My first really belly laugh of the week! Oh, if only I could remember my own dreams! This is super clever, Roz.
It’s scary how many of those things are actually happening to me!
Wonderful!