Mayor Lund’s School of Political Correctness | HumorOutcasts

Mayor Lund’s School of Political Correctness

June 26, 2011
The continuing saga of Mayor Lund and his Trailer Park

Hello, my name is Mayor Tom Lund, I’m the Mayor for a large trailer park in western PA.   Today, as I walked through the streets of the trailer park, I saw graffiti painted on the sidewalks, empty liquor bottles thrown under the shrubs and used condoms hung from the trees like Christmas Lights.   That’s when it hit me; these kids around here need some guidance.

Someone has to teach these future political leaders how to not get caught in wrongdoing and how to tell a convincing lie if they do get caught.Think how much different the world would be today if Richard Nixon knew how to lie  or if Bill Clinton would have used a humidor to keep his cigars moist rather then using his interns. And what if Anthony Weiner knew how to cover his electronic tracks after cyber sex.

I can teach these young hoodlums how to not get caught with their pants down before, during and after they get elected to public office. I’d be doing the American people a great service, since no one wants to hear about how their tax money is supporting the President’s sex fetish and cigar habit, a Congressman’s porno addiction, a Senator’s sex change operation or any other monkey business going on behind the closed doors of government offices.

For five easy payments of $19.95, I’ll get these hoodlums off the pot-holed filled roads of the trailer park and teach them to lie like a rug, how to hold their liquor, and how to deceive the American people and get a paycheck doing it. As with any school, I will have to have some requirements for the enlistment.   I think rule number one will be, you must have a healthy liver “before” enlisting.   I think we can come up with some more requirements as we go along.

And in store for lesson number one, will be a lecture on the importance of not leaving tracks on interns dresses, followed by a race to see who can consume the most liquor before passing out. Yes, I might be just what these kids around here need to give them some guidance and a political goal in life.  Lets face it, if they enjoy a life of sex, drugs, and alcohol, they may as well get a paycheck doing it!

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5 Responses to Mayor Lund’s School of Political Correctness

  1. Mayor Lunds Redneck Cousin
    June 27, 2011 at 7:09 pm

    How long does this course last?

    • Mayor Lund
      June 27, 2011 at 10:44 pm

      About as long as 8 six packs last.

  2. Kathy Minicozzi
    June 27, 2011 at 11:01 am

    This could be the most popular class ever!

  3. June 26, 2011 at 9:34 pm

    I’m sure your class would be full. There will alway be a market for political correctness.

  4. June 26, 2011 at 9:37 am

    Sounds like this could be a popular course! I would think your experience as a sex therapist would come in handy for this.

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